I mean a real man.
And it's weird, because I'm a feminist, and all the stupid, limited ideas that society puts on people to live up to their gender really just irk the crap out of me. But I really do want a man.
Like, with hairy arms and a broad chest. And big, beefy muscles, and toned forearms with the veins that I can poke because it's fun. And he'll let me because he rocks. And hands with messed up fingernails, and scars with cool, manly stories of manly stupidity. And he should like to drink, and not appletinis like J.D from Scrubs. I mean beer, and scotch and whiskey and the gross, hard stuff, but he likes it because he's a man. And he gets kind of jealous sometimes, and a little territorial, and I'll pretend I hate it, but when he threatens to knock some guy's teeth in, I'll be irritated, but also love him so much.
And he'll be able to take me in the bedroom. And the bathroom. And the kitchen. And over the couch. Really give it to me, y'know? With growling and biting and...just be an animal about it. And when we have kids, he'll teach our son to play baseball and football. And if he decides he likes nail polish and dolls better, he'll try to be mad at first, but then I'll tell him he's being an idiot and then he'll be accepting, like a man should be. Cause he'll be smart, and a good father too.
And if we have a daughter, he'll be irrationally protective of her because he loves her so so much, and he'll torment whoever she brings home. And he'll walk her down the aisle with tears in his eyes, but a scowl on his face, because he thinks that if he frowns, he'll distract people from the fact that he's crying because he's gonna miss his baby girl.
I want a man who is so manly it's stupid, and frustrating at times, but I know without a doubt that he can take care of me and love me the only way he knows how.
Like a man.