A New, Positive Step Towards My Dream + My Current Terrible Job Situation

Okay, so for those who know anything about me (I don't expect that to be many quite honestly, since I don't speak about myself often) but for those who do know anything of me, they know that I am a recent college graduate. I was a photography major and for the first year of it, I loved every minute. Unfortunately, as I've graduated college and I've realized how little photography does for me anymore, I'm losing my passion. Yes, I still adore it and I love to do it. But I don't have the fire or the drive for it, and honestly I don't really know if I ever did, as I look back on it.

The last few months of my life haven't been what I would call excellent; they've sucked quite honestly. I don't now why they have sucked; at least I didn't until now. I was so fucking unhappy; so stuck and depressed in life that I couldn't do anything but go to my shitty job and come how and be depressed. I didn't realize what was missing.

And even more frequently, I've been thinking about how I'm wasting the major that I got. I'm wasting my education. My closest friends (in real life) have been telling me for months that I need to go back to school for something reputable, something I can actually make a career out of. They both suggested law school because I'm a fucking wonderful arguer. But that's just not where my heart is.

Since I was at least 12, I've adored everything about music and the music industry. I was in band in grade school, from 6th to 12th grade, and I've always had a love and passion for singing. Growing up as a misunderstood teenager (aren't we all though?) the only place I ever felt at home was when I went to shows; when I was surrounded by the loud music, the vibe, the people, and the spirit. I loved watching bands go from babies to headliners in a matter of a few years. I remember seeing Cash Cash live on their first tour when they were literally nobody, and now look at them. Or The White Tie Affair... God, I love watching people's dreams come true.

That's why, I honestly feel like my calling is to be a touring manager. I need it. I need to feel the culture of different places, the electricity of shows every night, and the excitement of men and women doing their dream every single night while I simultaneously do mine beside them. I knew from a young age that I would never really be the forefront of the music industry if only because I'm not attractive enough (it's a hard truth that you shouldn't bother arguing. If you're not at least a few degree's attractive you won't make it) but honestly I just like making things run smoothly. I like watching things come together and I like being a part of why something is a success. I love planning, I love organizing, and honestly I just love being around people who love the same shit that I do.

My plan is to finish up the core classes that I have left this upcoming semester for my Associates degree, and then this time next year be living in Nashville, getting my BA in Arts and Entertainment Management. Alex and I share the exact same dream and we both want the same thing so badly. I think she's moving to Chicago to attend school for the same thing I would like to attend school for. We're kindred spirits and honestly I think we're going to be amazing friends through this.

So this is my dream.
Lacey Davidson; Touring Manager
God it has a fucking brilliant ring to it, doesn't it?
I'm not letting anything get in my way anymore.
I'm on a warpath of success and I swear to myself and to everyone reading this that I will succeed.

- - - - - -

On a different note, my job fucking sucks. Again, as many of you probably don't know, I work at Arby's. Which is literally the job from hell. I am the only seasoned employee there (I've worked there for a year and 3 months) and it just sucks so badly. Recently all of our other seasoned employees aside from 2 lifer's have quit and gotten new jobs. SO that leaves me, the most experienced, to train all of the new people they bring into the store and get them in perfectly oiled shape in 30 days. Not a lot of time, right?

Well, the entire time I've worked there, I've made 7.25/hour and that's just not cutting it anymore. Team Trainer's (which is the work I'm doing now) get paid 7.75/hour. It isn't a lot but shit it's more than 7.25 right? Well, they've got my name up on the TMPT board where you get all of your certifications, and I am certified as a Team Trainer. Would be awesome, right? Except I'm doing all of the work without the fucking pay.

Am I wrong to be pissed about this, or?
Because my GM seems to think that I am?