Do you want advice, or do you want sympathy?

So to a lot of friends and people I know, I'm a good advice giver. And I may come off as a bit of a dick but I do genuinely like to help people. What bugs me though is when people ask for my advice and then get all kinds of mad because it wasn't what they wanted to hear. I'm not going to lie to save your feelings. That's not what I do.

This has happened to me more times than I can count so it's hard to draw on a few specific examples. The way it usually goes is someone will ask my opinion and advice on some situation where they're clearly in the wrong and being stupid. I then won't agree with their stance on it and tell them that. Then they get all shitty because I didn't agree with them. If you want me to actually help, and tell you what I think, fucking go ahead. I'll do my best. But if all you want is for someone to go "bawww it's okay it's not your fault" then you can find some other pussy to do that for you.

I see it on this site a whole heap too. People post these long winded, convoluted blogs about something in their lives, their parents "just no understanding them" or their friends being mean or something and half the time, the author is clearly the one in the wrong. They are not responding the right way or they're in a very easily avoidable situation or they're just a genuinely stupid person. You're not some "misunderstood" case. You're being a whiny moron.

It's hard for people to accept criticism because you always look at situations through your own lens. You are the protagonist and the people who don't agree are the bad guys. Your quality of life and your potential as a decent human being improves tremendous amounts as soon as you're able to view yourself subjectively. Look at your faults. Work on your faults. Don't shift the blame on to others. If you are in the wrong, accept it and work on being a better person.
July 28th, 2013 at 04:35am