Locked up.

My family is insane, the slightest thing that can be considered suspicious, is me going to do something bad.

I can't go for a walk by myself, I can't even go for walks with friends because I might go meet people that maybe I shouldn't. I feel suffocated and locked up in my own house. They wondered why they saw me coming into the house one day at 6 am, the night was pretty and free and I could be me for once..
I keep wanting to do it again.. And I know I shouldn't but almost everything, I want to do is not allowed. I wanted to take a ballet class in the city...but no. I'd have to go by myself on the subway, and that's awful.
Would most parents be happy their daughter wants to take ballet?! It's cultural and a respectful form of dance.

I managed to beg my way into going on a spanish exchange program. I'm going to spain for 3 months. Staying with a host family, away from my pyscho, over protective, over bearing family..

It's all because I'm a girl...I carry a FUCKEN KNIFE! They don't know that, but if they did, it'd just be another thing I can't do.