I would normally start something like this off with "HAPPY ____", but who in the right mind would say happy suicide prevention day? Sure, I'm 100% glad and thankful that this is an actual thing, but it's no holiday, no celebration. It's something that we have come by because there had been a large amount of suicides in the world, and thats not something to be happy about.
If you're suicidal and you're still here...
I am so proud of you.
If you think no one cares...
People do... I do.
If you feel alone, helpless...
I know exactly what you're feeling, but you're not alone. You never have been and you never will be.
I know what it feels like to be so mentally and physically drained... To be so exhausted. Suffering, all day, everyday... Fighting off that bone chilling sadness. Fighting for your life...
There are so many things I want to say, so many thoughts running around in my head. There is so much I want to say, so much I want to scream at the world, but I'm coming short.
I cringe and I mean really cringe every time I hear or see someone say "Kill yourself". It disgusts me. There is even a popular picture online (social media sites) that people will post whenever they see someone do something they don't like. (http://www.quickmeme.com/kill-yourself/?upcoming).
Whenever I see that picture or even hear people joke about killing themselves, I feel sick. Suicide is a serious thing. Beyond serious, actually.
What if you jokingly say 'kill yourself' to someone, not knowing that they had actually thought about it, and then they take what you said to heart? Why is it even okay for people to think that they can joke about suicide? What made it into a joke in the first place?
Do you know what another person is thinking? Feeling? No. You can never know what is going through a persons head, you can assume, but you can never know. The person can tell you what they are feeling, sure, but am I the only one that has struggled with completely getting out my feelings or thoughts? Because there are too many. Too much.
On a random note, if you are reading this; how was your day? Week?
I always like to ask people who are struggling what the best and worst parts of their day was or is so far. I want people to think about that best thing, even if it was just a small thing, (like eating your favorite cookie) and I want them to see what they could to do enjoy that thing more often. I want you to find that thing you enjoyed and try to see if you could enjoy it everyday, or turn it into a big thing. Instead of letting all the bad things that happen to you add up, focus on the small, but good things.
It takes a lot of strength and willpower to be positive or look for someone to help and talk to. It takes a huge and tiring amount of strength to push past your suicidal thoughts or to live with depression, stress, anxiety, and so on.
Some of the best advice or support I have ever gotten was when someone told me that breaking down was just a sign that I have taken everything life has thrown at me. That the struggling and pain I was feeling was because I have been so damn strong and have taken all the shit that was thrown my way... That I AM strong.
And the same applies for everyone else. YOU ARE STRONG. YOU DO MATTER. YOU CANNOT BE REPLACED. YOU ARE LOVED(even if you believe otherwise). AND YOU DESERVE AND HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO LIVE. TO SURVIVE. TO GROW AND LEARN AND LOVE. TO BECOME WHO YOU ARE. TO FIND YOUR HAPPINESS. YOU FUCKING DESERVE IT.
Happiness is real and it is out there, waiting for you. So push on, fight your demons or evil fire breathing dragons, and get there. No matter what it is that is making you feel like this, conquer everything trying to pull you down, show them you're better than anything they've ever imagined. Show them you believe and things will turn up for you.
(Just a random blog #1 for this week.)
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