Story Thing

Ok, so, thus far I've only published criminal on this website, bit I've actually been working on another story. I wanted to keep it a secret so that only I knew about it and eventually I wanted to get it published. I've worked very hard on it, adding much more detail than I normally do. This is mostly because I can go back and change whatever I like, for example, I can add a character. I've got about 8,500 words of text I'm happy with for the beginning of the story, and 15,000 total words. That includes text I haven't edited at all, so it's actually missing two characters.

I have so much more I want to add to it, I know what direction I want to take it and I know the ins and outs of the characters. I think it will be a great story and I'm really trying not to show it to anyone but people I trust because I'm paranoid. I'm scared that once I post it anywhere that I'll lose possession of it and I won't be able to get it published if I actually do finish it. As I've said, I have put a lot of time tweaking the story and developing my characters and I don't want to eliminate that option.

But I find it hard to write that story as much as I should. I thrive and am motivated by subscribers and comments. I find myself writing more when I have people pushing me with their own passion for what I wrote. I feel I need that push on this story.

Anyway, that's why I'm writing this. I want your guys' opinion. Maybe you can calm my paranoia. Should I post the story? Will I still be able to get it for real published if I do?

Any help you guys can give me is great... Also here's a snippet from the intro of the story.

I thought about naming it "The Plague" but it seemed so dismal... So it currently doesn't have a name. But here you go:

Happiness is a thing of the past. So many people have died. Including the only people I was ever close to.

"Hey guys over here." I heard a voice. Something bubbled in my chest. Was this a person? Would they rescue me?... Of course not, why would I think that? I'm the mute, the useless girl that only causes trouble. Why would they ever want me?

"What is it?" Someone else answered, they sounded very frustrated.

"It's... a girl?" He sounded really close. I felt someone pull on my shoulder and roll me over. His face was inches from mine... He had really beautiful eyes, they were a fantastic blue color, the light covering if dirt on his face appeared to make them shine unnaturally bright. There's something about his rugged appearance that's really quite attractive... Oh god, did I just think that? I squeaked and closed my eyes.

"Is it her?" A third voice called.

"Well her coat had 'mute' written on it so I'd assume so." What? I have a reputation now? I'm not even really a mute, well... I guess technically I am... But I'll talk, someday, but only if the words will truly matter.

His fingers brushed my skin, then lingered above and below my eye. He gently forced my eyes open, checking their color.

"But her eyes aren't grey so we have to take her in." He, who appears to be the leader, shouted back at the others then tapped my cheek and started whispering.

"Hey open your eyes." I followed his instructions and I was staring into his eyes again. "We will keep you safe, okay? We're not like the others; we won't kick you out. You'll be okay." I felt tears in my eyes. No one has ever promised me safety. It was such a small gesture but worth so much, especially when you've only been berated and beaten during your small time in this new, grey, world.

"Hey guys, help me with her. I don't think she can stand." He called for they others.

"Probably because she hasn't eaten in forever. No one wants her, she's useless." That grumpy voice answered. His words cut like knives, I knew I was worthless, but it still hurts to hear it said. More tears sprang forward into my eyes.

"Hey," The leader snapped. "She's still a human being, we can't leave her." He pushed my hair out of my face, and tried to wipe my tears away but I flinched.

"Did... Did you think I was going to hit you?" He mumbled, I couldn't look him in the eyes. I haven't known a caring touch in so long. How was I supposed to know he was trying to be nice? I mean, sure he just said he will not leave me here to die, but that doesn't mean anything.

Thank you for reading this!