Venting

Okay this is for everyone that feels useless. Guys I have been there myself, trust me, I have been placed in a lot of crisis hospitals for one reason or another. The last few weeks I have been thinking a lot about people like me, who are afraid to step in to the light because they are ashamed of who they are or what they have become. I was there and I still am, but one day I walked outside and the sun was shining, the leaves were falling off the trees, and I kid you not it was absolutely freezing. The air pretty much stole my breath; I stayed there and contemplated whether or not people would actually care if I die. The next morning came and I was back at school; a guy came up to me after class and said, "Why haven't you been at school? People are saying that you're crazy." This in general didn't faze me because I got it everyday, I had a wall up. His name is Korbin and we don't know each other that much, we just aren't in the same social classes, he is popular I'm not. I told him the truth because I thought maybe he would leave me alone if he knew just a fraction of my feelings. I told him that I was placed in a mental health facility for contemplating suicide and self harm. Korbin stared at me a moment and lifted up his shirt so I could see his hips and what I saw what something I was not expecting what so ever. There plain as day were puffed up white scars criss crossing over and over again, each one worse than the first. He looked me in the eye and hugged me, totally and completely moved I hugged back. He was the top guy at school and he hugged me, the "weirdo" of the school. He whispered to me that he knew that I self harm before I told him. This world is bad yes it is, but the people who look at you and hug you for no reason or for a reason. I want you to hug back and think that maybe that individual sees you differently than you view yourself. It really doesn't seem like it, but I care about you. We are miles and miles away from eachother, but every single day I pray that everyone who is like me, the misunderstood, and the people who are right on the verge of a breakdown, know that I care about them. I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU AND I CARE ABOUT EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT.