Growing Up

I am finally a senior in high school. As if high school isn't hard enough they through college shit at you and then you are expected to grow up and get a job and be mature. Well i am 17 years old and just want to live my life as a normal teenage girl, but I know, what is normal now?

So i know where I want to go to college and I am on the way there but I hate how I feel alone and like no one can help me. I have to be grown up and do it all on my own and I have no idea where to start.

I love my books and love how you can escape into one. Yes I am lazy, even though lazy is not a real word. Lazy is a word humans made up to hide the deeper reason as to why we don't do shit.
Is it fear?
Is it ignorance?
Do we not know how?

I know I have to grow up and really don't want to yet.

But I will eventually.........