What to do, what to do...

Hey, Mibba.

So it's 9:37, I have a midterm on Friday, I have a paper to turn in worth 30% of my grade due on Thursday, I'm broke as FUDGE and the only thing I've done today is bake cookies and workout.

At least it was somewhat productive.

I think part of this funkiness may be because of my new status as single. Things had been hard with the boyfriend for 3 months so we're on a break. Before that happened he had been encouraging me to have my "fun", as in to see other people, because he had had his. And now that I'm single I'm interested in doing that but I'm so confused!

I'm missing him like crazy right now. I'm thinking of hopping in my car right now and driving to his apartment.

I can't think of a time where I have been this confused. Part of me really wants to stay strong and wait this break out - not to return to him out of weakness. I know I need this time to explore who I am outside of our relationship but I'm so scared I'll lose him. I wish it were all clear to me but it's all muddled.

Muddled by my English major-dom, college writing, cute boys in my science class and not being single since I was 16.

I hardly know myself. That's why I need this. And in a way, I do want to see other people and I think he may be meeting with a girl this weekend..

It's only been a week, so who knows? More time needed? Probably.