A Letter To Him

I don't want you to change the way you think of me just because of my problems. Sometimes I hate myself for bringing you into my problems and taking things out on you. It's hard to explain my emotions exactly and what is going through my head. I have tried to, though. Just for you.

I don't want you to think less of me because of the problems I have...I just wish you could understand what I'm going through, but you never will. I wish you could just be me for one day. Just so you could know what it's like.

You'd know that the small fraction of these feelings that you sometimes see is only a mere glimpse.
You'd know that they are there, in the back of my head every minute of the day, not just when I try to show them to you.
You'd know how I truly feel about you.
You'd know how many times I have cried myself to sleep and you'd know why.
You'd know why I hurt and when and how.

Maybe you'd be able to understand and maybe you would love me regardless.

Or maybe you wouldn't.
February 3rd, 2014 at 12:26am