No Pants Real Talk Confession Blog Thing....

So, yeah, pants suck, so I am not wearing any, ladies and gentlemen ;)

Anyway, now that my flirting has been done. Let's get on to real talk confession blog thing.

So I am absolutely shit with everything right now. Someone I care for is in the hospital with cancer and I won't share who because it's not my right to and someone I love and care for is on this site sometimes and it's not fair of me. But I am scared as much as she is and when I heard, I kinda wept silently in the back of the car for a little while.

My brother was attacked last Friday by his uncle and that alone kind of stressed me out. I couldn't see him and I was panicking because I didn't know what the hell was going on and I cancelled plans the next day not expecting to sleep.

I'm behind on my project, though am playing the whole "No, no. I'm on track" card. I'm behind....

I am behind on quizzes and they are fucking me up pretty badly. Like, half the questions aren't even in the book, dick heads.

Knowledge Bowl is fucking frightening. My team is depending on me to know things that I am having trouble learning and I'm scared shitless that I will bring us all down. And we have about a month before we are going and OMG I'm gonna cry.

AND ON TOP OF IT ALL, MY WRITING HAS COME TO A HALT. AFTER FUCKING CLEO, I LOST INSPIRATION! I don't know how to feel about Cleo, there was feedback through the beginning and then people stopped and I lost confidence in it and it's hard for me to get past that. I write for me, but I also write for other people, I write to get opinions and to share ideas and when there is nothing, it's hard for me to move from that and do something else. Not to mention that this was a new concept for me and it was hard enough as it was. I just wish I knew how it came out in other peoples eyes.

I'm also sick. Got a cold and there is fluid in my ear, it's annoying and I am more deaf than I was before.

On the plus side, I am going to the Yale Art Gallery again today and that should be fun. Plus, we are trying sushi at a new place, which can be exciting.

Externship is around the corner! But I don't know where the hell I am going.... I know where as in the location, but not the where are in specific place. Maybe I won't even make it to Maine to do it, but I want to.

I dunno, stress and -sigh-

xxBambi