The Flame

I've been seeing this new guy for about 2 months now. He is absolutely wonderful. He respects me, he is there for me when I need him, and he makes me feel wonderful about myself.
I've told him that he makes me happy, and he says that no one can make you feel a certain way. and I realized that he's right.

He makes me make myself happy. If that makes any sense at all.

Going into the relationship, I had told myself that I wanted one of those light-hearted, carefree college relationships. I wanted a companion to be there for me, but I didn't want to feel dependent upon them, or even really that attached to them. I'm going to Europe next February or March, and will be gone until the following September. He's going to grad school after the end of the next school year. Possibly half-way across the continent.

We describe our futures as very grey areas. Yes. future.s. We don't talk about the future singular, as in one future together. We live in the moment. Which is wonderful. It's exciting. and also nerve-racking. I'm not saying that I think he's my soulmate, or that I want to be with him forever. I can't see that far ahead. And honestly, I don't believe that. I just know that whenever we break up, it's going to hurt because he's great.

This worked out completely different. We got serious pretty fast. And the flame burns hot.

And now I'm scared it's going to turn around and burn me.

Nothing has gone bad, and nothing is going bad right now. But I'm still worried.

I was in my literature class today, and we discussed the parallels and differences between the two main relationships in Anna Karenina. Anna and Vronsky's vs. Constantine and Kitty's. A member of my discussion group mentioned that Constantine and Kitty's relationship is very innocent and slow to start, pointing out the fact that they don't even touch each other at all for the entirety of the book. (I haven't read the book, we're only half way through the movie, so I'm not sure if that's correct. She claims it is) She commented that it's obvious their relationship is meant to last. That it's a more spiritual connection with one another. Anna and Vronsky jump into the relationship quickly, and it is extremely passionate. The girl in my group said that Anna and Vronsky's relationship burned quickly and too hot, and it was obvious that the flame could never possibly last.

and I kind of wonder to myself if that's the case here.