Good-bye Is Not Forever. An Update.

I guess before I bid farewell I'll give an update on things that have happened. If you read my last blog which was twenty-nine days ago, I was kicked out of my house in a state where I had no family for friends that I could trust to stay with. That night I slept in my car. Of all nights in the humid hell known as Georgia, it was fucking COLD. I was fucking COLD. Yeah, way to go Georiga, the one night of the year I don't want it to be cold.

The sixteen hour trip here wasn't all that bad... only bad thing was nearing the end I started hallucinating... uh I didn't sleep that night and I woke up at 7am to go to work and school... So, I was up Tuesday, Wednesday, and into Thursday morning - stressed, depressed, betrayed, and tired. I was freaking out. I remember freaking out because I saw marks on my arms and just... scary shit. I haven't told anyone that so...

Anyway, with only a few days here I could tell this place was better. I no longer have insomnia, when I lay down I fall asleep. Mind you, I was sleeping on a futon mattress on the floor. (I got a brand new bed yesterday with a pillow top mattress, holy hell it sleeps like a beaut*.)

My family hasn't called to ask if I'm okay, lol. I've talked to my co-workers about my aunt Tammy to see how she is, since I truly do worry. I don't regret moving. I don't regret what I said. In fact, I'm happy it all went down that way or I would still be in the hellish place contemplating the most effective, cost efficient, cleanest way to die. And that's the truth. Because of them I began self-harming again for a few months. I couldn't sleep. I woke up stressed out. I loved working more than being home, I was thinking of volunteering for a few 12/24 hour clients for Heaven's sake.

So... they are no longer my family, and I can say that without animosity or depression. It's like me saying there's no toilet paper in the bathroom. Just is what it is.

Anyway, I got a job at TJ Maxx, say whut, 10% discount. It pays, even though so far I only have two days a week that I work, I hope I get more hours. :V
I'm not saying I'm leaving forever. Maybe once the conspiracy theories and the staff hate has quietened down I may come back, slim possibility though since I still see my Mibba-experience as being completely ruined and shattered. Not going to say why but... yeah.

When I think of Mibba all I can think of is, "wow, how bitter."

I still love my friends and the staff that I was able to get to know. Anyway, so if you'd like to talk to me:

Battlenet ID: GrumpBunny
Skype: omg.Brittanylawls

I'd give my tumblr and twitter but I don't get on either of those.

I hope that I can feel comfortable enough in the future to get back on here. As of right now, I don't even feel like sharing my personal opinions, thoughts, dreams, or experiences.

Welp, ciao guys.

I'll be wishing everyone the best.
April 24th, 2014 at 02:46am