How to Lose Weight the *Unhealthy* Way.

Since this is the thing people do now:
Trigger warning!
____________________________C'est possible...

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I'll say it straight up: I used to be anorexic. I don't think I was doing it right because I didn't get bone-thin like I wanted, I just got really pale and sick and constipated. At that time I was eating a small meal a day and listening to the advice of this anorexic girl who told me how to eat and what to do. I didn't exercise though, and fuck eating a single nut a day -- I would eat something like a bagel or a bowl of cereal then spend the rest of my evening lying on my bed listening to my stomach growl and rubbing my ribcage.

Fast forward to today: I've stopped caring about my weight for like a year, and that anorexic girl I used to listen to got herself some help and she's now healthy and happy. I was healthy and happy too until I recently went dress shopping for my prom and looked at myself in the Mirror of Truth in my dressing room.

That's the exact moment where I thought to myself: I need to stop eating again.

Right now I'm 5'4 and weigh around 125 pounds, but I remember a time in September of 2012 when I kissed my boyfriend for the first time and cheered at home when I stepped on the scale and it said 112.

While my previous anorexic phase made me constipated, I gotta admit it made me thinner. I'm not going to warn my boyfriend either like I usually do (so he stops buying me food). The last time I did all he said was something like: "You looked so sick when you used to stop eating; it wasn't attractive," and "I don't want to be with a girl who starves herself."

I won't really tell anyone who sees me in real life. And I'm not even sure if now is the time to be starving myself when my prom dress is non-returnable and it'll slip off of me if I lose a couple pounds.

So I'll take it slow. I'll get into a bigger habit of exercising throughout the day and try to shrink my stomach by eating smaller / fewer meals.

It just sucks s-o-m-u-c-h seeing all these gorgeous girls at my school, and I'm over here feeling like a turd.