Update On Life(I Need Your Guys Opinions)

So yesterday I had to go to court once again because of the custody/visitation battle I'm having with my son's father. We were there for over three hours and once again, nothing was resolved. They still want to change his last name from mine to theirs and they're just not agreeing to anything we say.

Right now, they're visiting him on Wednesdays for two hours and Sundays for four hours, every week. It's been like this since February 12th. Yesterday my lawyer presented us with the schedule that my son's father wrote up and basically it was like this.

We will continue with every Wednesday for two hours. At nine months we want every Sunday for six hours. At eighteen months we want 8 hours on Sunday, plus one overnight every other weekend and an extra day in the week for 6 hours. When he turns 2 we want one week in the summer and then six weeks in the summer after he turns 3. We will alternate holidays and the mother gets Mother's Day.

Excuse me? Who the fuck do you think you are. Now how is that fair? Do you guys think that's fair? They want to take up EVERY Sunday for the rest of my life and not give me any Sundays with my son. How is that fair?

I agreed to everything but that. I suggested the 1st and 3rd Sunday of the month but they can keep the Wednesday and we even said they have him all day on Sundays but only the 1st and 3rd Sundays.

Our lawyer told their lawyer and they would not agree with that.

Then they want to drop my last name and give Rylan his dad's last name. I will agree to a hyphen but you're not dropping my last name, I'm sorry. For starters, his father didn't even want a part of this and even wished death on Rylan when I told him I was pregnant. If he wants a kid with his last name he needs to marry his current girlfriend and knock her up and they can have a kid together.

I just...seriously...do you guys think this is fair?

I'm agreeing to everything they say, even the overnight and summer visitations...even though I don't think they should get summer visits until he's in school....because they're not communicating with us at all right now.

Every time his mother, the other grandmother, comes to pick him up, I always tell her when he last ate/slept but when she brings him back she won't relay anything to us.

On top of all that he smells like fucking cigarette smoke. We've asked them not to smoke around him and they're still doing it.

Plus, they're trying to prove I'm an unfit mother.

But yeah...I'm asking again.

Do you guys think it's unfair of me to give them the 1st and 3rd Sundays? Like I said, right now they're taking up every Wednesday and every Sunday and have been since February.

I just...I can't even with people.

I don't think I'm being unfair at all by agreeing to everything they ask for; alternating holidays, keeping the Wednesday the same, starting overnights after he turns 18 months, the summer visits when he turns 2 and 3...the only thing I don't agree with is every Sunday.

I mean...fuck, I'd like to spend two Sundays out of each month with my son.

Ugh.

This is so stressful and traumatizing Rylan so bad. He doesn't want to eat or sleep after he comes back from there...he fusses when I change his diaper or go to get him dressed when we have to go out and he's NEVER done that before he started going over there.

Just...I don't even know anymore.

I need to update the Easter pictures I took of him...if I do, do you guys want to see them? I bought him a cute suit outfit and everything.

I'm sorry for complaining and yeah...if anyone reads this whole thing, bless your face.