I want to clarify at the start of this blog, right here, right now, that I KNOW and I BELIEVE that not all parents are like this. This is aimed towards strict parents, the ones which the title of this blog refers to.
Why do parents not let their kids be individual? Unique? Now, I’m not talking here about the parents “no I will not let you go out partying all night”, oh no. I’m talking about the “you are never dying your hair, getting a piercing, getting a tattoo, wearing band merch, going to comic cons, going to concerts” kind of parents.
What the hell is so wrong with letting your 16-19 year old child, dye their hair a crazy color for a few weeks before they get bored and wash it out? What is so wrong with allowing your 16-19 year old child to get a piercing that they are more than likely going to take out in a year’s time. What the hell is so wrong with letting your 16-19 child BE WHO THEY WANT TO BE AND NOT WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO BE.
I mean, I get the piercings. It’s one thing to let your child have a massive, say, lip piercing. But what is so wrong with navel piercings, or web piercings, or septum piercings? Piercings that can be hidden easily. Piercings that are already in a hidden place? You can flip a septum piercing up and I have a job with no qualms. As long as I don’t wear it down in front of the customers, I’m allowed to work there. As long as I keep my belly button covered (which the uniform does anyone), I’m allowed to work there.
It’s like, I stretched my ear out and my job said as long as I didn’t go past 10mm I would be allowed to keep my job. Yet when my family saw it, they flipped out, screaming about how I would never be allowed to work blah di blah di blah. Well um, no, my job allows me to do it?
Hair dying. You know, most places will let you work there no matter what color your hair is. Yes, they are more likely to hire you if your hair is not a vibrant pink but many places of work will take you on. The girl I do my shift with has her hair like Ashley Costello, half bright red, half black. SHE IS ALLOWED TO WORK.
What’s so wrong with getting a small tattoo somewhere hidden? Like on your ankle? I have one there myself, and once again MY JOB ALLOWS IT BECAUSE THE UNIFORM COVERS IT. Yes. I get the whole “no you are not getting a tattoo on your neck”, I accept that one but wow yes someone can really see a bow and arrow on my ankle, which is covered by shoes, socks AND trousers and they’re going to be so offended by someone serving them food with that.
What is so wrong with letting your kids go somewhere where they are going to make friends that LIKE THEM FOR THEM? I’ve been to one gig in my whole life and I made better friends there in an hour and a half then what I did in twelve years of education and four years of church. I made friends that, will call me and ask me to go out with them, that will call me if I say I’m not feeling great, that will come round unannounced and take me out socially with them, which is, by the way, something you tell me to do all the time. I would love to go to Comic Con. I would love to have the opportunity to meet new friends and say, Tom Hiddleston or Sebastian Stan or Chris Evans. That would make me so happy, you have no idea. But oh wait, sorry. Internet friends that you have been Skyping with for the past seven months aren’t really who they say they are and are really 80 year old predators. I forgot.
And not being allowed to wear band merch? Are you fucking kidding me? Do you know what I would give to have just one band shirt that isn’t mass produced such as Nirvana or Guns ‘n’ Roses? I would love to walk around with my favourite band on my chest. Maybe that’s just me but I would love to support the band I love; that have helped me out of difficult spots (which is apparently bullshit because “music can’t save lives” right yea I forgot that bit.)
Just because you frown upon something does not mean your kid should be treated like this. Make deals with them.
“Yes, ok, I do not like ear stretching but I will say yes, as long as you do not go over 6mm.”
“Yes, you can have your septum pierced as long as you have it hidden around me.”
“Yes, you can dye your hair, but only over the summer holidays.”
“Yes, you can go to that gig, but I pick you up and drop you off and you text me at certain points throughout the night so I know you are safe.”
COMPROMISE with your children. They will grow out of this phase themselves and slowly, overtime, they won’t hate you for not letting them live their lives. I don’t even want my septum piercing anymore, but I’m keeping it in just so I can rub it in my parents’ faces that I can get a job with one; that I can be SUCCESSFUL with “a hunk of metal through [my] nose”. If you constantly hold your kids back, they will rebel. Take it from a kid with a lot of dislike towards her parents. We DO and we WILL fight back at some point and by then, compromise does not seem like a good option to us.
It took me to go out and have my navel pierced for my parents to finally compromise on it (if it gets infected it comes out and I am not allowed it done again until I am 18+) and the compromise is fair.
Seriously, work WITH your kids, not AGAINST them, because we do not forget it.
Not registered?
Create an account