Sometimes

Sometimes I like to read through my old, old Mibba posts about my husband, posts from earlier periods in our relationship, and reminisce.

We met in person for the first time over five years ago now. We've been in a relationship and living together for almost four and a half years. Tomorrow we'll be married for four months.

I know that's not a long time in the grand scheme of things. I look at my parents, who will have been married 30 years this December, and I know we've got a lot to go through together yet. When my husband and I had only been dating six months, I already felt like I had a grasp on this love thing. But, like any other greater aspect of life, the more I learn about it the more I realize I hardly know a thing.

I'm okay with that.

I knew I wanted to spend my life with him before we'd been together six months. I wrote a long blog on Mibba then reprimanding myself for being too clingy and jumping in too fast, because I knew that six months was nothing, six months was the blink of an eye and longer-lasting relationships than that could deteriorate more easily. I couldn't imagine what could possibly possess me to think of marriage and a family so soon. But it all turned out all right.

I still never leave for class or work without kissing him goodbye and I still never go to bed without kissing him goodnight. I still can't wait to hug him and kiss him first thing when I get home from work every night. I still get chills when he touches me. I think I always will.

I woke up yesterday morning feeling inexplicably happy. I rolled over and my husband was lying next to me, scruffy-faced and open-mouthed and buried under two thick quilts, and everything felt right, and I felt a fresh wave of gratitude for every morning that he and I actually get to wake up together. (Working opposite shifts, it doesn't happen every day anymore.)

I woke up happy today, too, and my husband and I went on a long walk, and when we got home I started reading those old posts. I saw a couple where I was making plans for our first and second anniversaries, and now I'm already caught up in wondering what we'll do for our first wedding anniversary.

Everything just feels good today. I feel romantic. I'd love to take my husband on a date soon, but unfortunately we're both booked solid for the next couple weeks. Well, maybe in a couple weeks, then. =)

Hope you're having a good day, Mibba.

I guess I should get myself ready for class/work now.