I Hate This.

Seriously, why do I have to have a crush on him?

Urg!

I was doing really good on my own, being independent, not thinking about boys. I was doing really good! I had a couple guys on the go, actually, but I didn't like any of them. they were just boy toys, you know. I was just being a player. Then, I met him. Now, I have a typical schoolgirl crush on him and it's really. Fucking. Annoying.

Like, I'm just sitting here thinking about him constantly, wondering when he'll come online. I hate having feelings, feelings and I don't get on very well. He was online an hour ago and didn't answer my last message, and he wasn't online at all the day before. Usually, with any other guy, that wouldn't bother me in the least. Usually, I don't need to be in constant contact. usually, I'm good with going a while without talking, I'm good with doing my own thing. But with him, I'm upset that he didn't message me. I'm upset that we haven't talked. I miss him, and I want cuddles, and I hate myself for feeling like this.

I want these feelings to go away.