Insanity

Inanity is to do the same thing over and over and expecting a different result each time. Many of us go through our moments of insanity but few of ever stay in that mind frame permanently. Abusive relationships are a great example of insanity. Abuse is not always physically evident. Many times the person who abuses the victim doesn't get physical right away.The abuse most often times starts small with verbal abuse. The physical abuse sometimes is a result of the abusers frustration with the sense of lack of control.

Abusers are often people who have self esteem issues stemming from early childhood. When they grow older and the problems have not been addressed and corrected it follows them into their adult life. When the individual engages in a relationship they seek for someone they feel that they can control and manipulate. The person being abused also tends to have emotional problems as well.

Victims of domestic violence usually have such low self esteem that they feel guilty for the abuse. Some don't have any sense of self worth. Any love is better than none. Who will love me? I can change them it was my fault, I made them angry. Nobody else will want or love me so this is better than nothing at all.

I have seen many people stay in relationships like that both men as well as woman. All at different levels of abuse, some with children which makes the situation harder to walk away from. I wanted to take a moment to tell people that it doesn't have to be that way. There are always options and ways to walk away.

It is okay to be angry but its not okay to hurt one another. Under no circumstances is it okay to put your hands on one another. It is not okay to mentally,verbally and emotionally abuse each other. Everyone in a relationship should feel safe to have a difference of opinion. I'm sorry doesn't fix things and doesn't mean that they are really sorry. If you say sorry and you do the same thing over repeatedly you are not sorry.

Staying in abusive relationships for your children is not a reason to stay. Your children will not benefit from such an environment. They will be better off in a single parent household where they are safe and happy. Walking away from such a thing won't be easy but in the future your kids will thank you and you will be happier and healthy.

If you live in a dangerous physical situation be smart about how you leave. Don't tell anyone you are leaving the element of surprise is best. Look for agencies that help people in domestic violence situations.