I've been getting a bit better, I've started packing a few more, healthier snacks when I leave the house and my boyfriend likes to text me at normal human eating times and tell me to eat something, but it's still difficult and it still makes me miserable.
BUT. I've recently decided that instead of being miserable until I can get my life together and then hopefully be happy, I'm just gonna embrace how I look now and go with it. For the past couple years I've been telling myself that once I get skinny again, I'll be happy. But guys, that's a horrible way to live. I've been constantly shrinking away from clothes I love because of how I think I look in them, I can't eat around other people because I feel like they're judging me, and I have such a lack of confidence. So I decided that I'm done. I'm gonna wear what I want, when I want, because I can. I'm a human, so what's stopping me from wearing human clothes and looking hella cute?
Nothing. That's the correct answer.
I have a couple sheerish shirts that I adore but never wear because I don't even like looking at me, so why would other people? But I decided to wear one today:
(Don't mind the background just taking selfies at work #noregrets)
I think I look pretty cute. I love 90s grunge fashion, but I'm not quite brave enough to go all out with it yet so this is what I ended up with.
So yeah, there's me just getting serious and changing my life around.
*****
Despite the fact that I'm literally on Mibba all day erryday, I haven't written/posted anything new in 4 days, and I haven't written anything new for my chaptered stories in a couple weeks. That makes me really sad.
But, I was looking through this thread and low-key answering some of the questions the way Luc and Mikey from The Fallen would, and I think I've gotten some inspiration back. I couldn't figure out where I wanted to start after the prologue, because I want this story to be decently long unlike everything else I've written, but I think I've finally found a good place. Hopefully I can get it updated tonight.
I have a love/hate relationship with That Summer. I've been trying to write it for 2 years, and after getting some editing and rewriting it a bit, it's finally in a spot that I like. I started it with the intention of it being cliche, in the sense that it's a typical summer romance like every YA book ever written, but I feel like my writing is kind of being compromised to adhere to the whole clicheness of it. I usually write stories where people die or are just in unhealthy relationships (see: literally everything I have up here), so I'm finding it hard to find a balance between the dialogue, character development, and descriptions for this story without feeling like everything is cheesy. That being said, I do have almost the entire plot planned out, so hopefully I can get that updated soon.
Fingertips is my baby right now. It started out as just a descriptive paragraph that I wrote because I was stuck in a horrible writer's block and was trying really hard to find a way out of it. I was originally going to just make it a drabble and post it because I hadn't posted anything in forever, but I ended up getting random inspiration to turn it into a non-chronological, super short story. The only reason I haven't updated it is because I'm getting to the part of the character's relationship where it was much more happy, and we all know I don't write happy well.
I currently have 2 one-shots on the go. The first is a my entry for the Summer Nights Contest. Again, happy story, something Lizz needs to work on. The second is fanfiction. If you know me, you probably know that the only fanfiction I've ever written was for a Rounds contests (does anyone remember when those were popular?) and I got knocked out in the first round because it sucked. So I kind of just avoid it. But I was inspired by Kandi's amazing Rellamy stories as well as a prompt from our The 100 Fandom Club (which you should totally join if you're a fan of The 100) , and I've decided to write one of my own. It's also going to be happy and romantic (MAKE IT STOP WHY AM I WRITING HAPPY THINGS), and I'm attempting to make it longer than 1,000 words because I'm a drabble whore.
So that's my update on all things stories.
*****
I'm also a contest whore, but instead of entering more contests before I finish all the stories for the ones I'm in, I decided to make one!. It's a songfic contest (of course) and has a ton of songs that I'm loving right now so you should go join it.