Updated 11/23/15

I've graduated and I feel like my life is just a mess. I don't know where to start so I'll just go over key points

I recently enrolled into Community College because I realized I was so unprepared to go to a university. So now I'm back tracked mostly because I was lying to myself about what I wanted to do with my life. You know I never understood why we're all suppose to know what we're going to be when we're older. Do people not know what kind of pressure that puts people under. Granted there are people who know what they are passionate about and what they want to do, I was one of those.

Of course when I said that I want to be a writer that was shot down faster than a bullet. So I just kept jumping from one career to the other all because I apparently can't pick the "right" career for the rest of my life.

My boyfriend is in a learning program with Mercedes Benz and he wants me to move with him to where ever. Yeah I'm stoked, but it's like I'm terrified because he's graduating in April. I just now decided to stick with writing at my career and I don't even have a quarter of my general education done yet.

Speaking of my boyfriend we just reached 5 years. I mean the whole moving thing is my big issue with him right now, he firmly believes that I'm just psyching myself out and that I'm fine and he tells me that he doesn't want me just behind him, but by his side. I love him though and nothing's going to change that. I just can't see myself happy without him because he's still there with me when I'm having bad days and helps me through them.

My parents are getting a divorce. I mean I saw it coming, but I just didn't think it would be this late and this messy I guess. I don't really know how to explain how I feel about it.

My doctor said that my hormonal levels are high and that I could develop osteoporosis, a heart murmur, and my anxiety will get worse if it continues to be high. Her solution, take one less pill a week to hopefully normalize everything. Lately I've just been feeling meh.My anxiety is still pretty bad though.

I got a job, I work at the front desk of a hotel. It's nice, pays well. I switched to full time, but I don't take their insurance because I'm still on my moms.

I think that really sums up everything I guess.