I just got internet at my new place, so maybe I'll be on more often. At least, that's what I'm hoping will happen. A lot has changed in my life since I used to write a lot through 2009-2013 when I got my first job. So let me recap on what has happened:
1.) Started Working: I got my first job I think at the beginning of 2014 as a beauty advisor. I originally agreed to work 10 hour shifts three days a week so I would be able to go to a community college. Haha. Right. I loved my job, but I began almost automatically working 40 hour shifts, and I was only able to have three days a week off, two days went to college. You'd think that would be plenty, but suddenly I had an awesome group of friends and my college started going on the back burner. My parents talked me into buying a $29,000 car right off the lot, so it wasn't like I could stop working. I had a $400 a month car payment, and working minimum wage was barely covering the car and college.
2.) Started Failing College: So work talked me into shorter shifts, but now working 5 days a week and two in college. Which was ehhhh...probably not the best idea but I still needed the money. So after failing two semesters I'm now on academic probation and I cannot get any financial aid.
3.) Met Someone: So around fall of 2014 a cute guy started working at the store. We started hanging out and we clicked. Now I'm not saying we're soul mates, but we work well together. This being said began some better points of this past three year span.
4.) I Started Going on Trips: My boyfriend Max and I started going on a lot of trips together. We visited the city of Syracuse, went hiking in the Airodondacks, visited the Great Lakes, hiked a bit in the Appalacian mountains, went spelunking (which is cave exploring) in Pennsylvania, visited the beach numerous times, went to West Virginia and hiked there, even visited the beach on New Years. It was pretty amazing.
5.) Moved Out: I moved out of my parents house! A big accomplishment. I couldn't tell you what was the last straw, but it had to happen. My home life wasn't that great. I know everyone thought Max and I were rushing moving in together, or that's what I felt like. We had been dating less than a year and then we moved, but it just happened at the right time. He was living with friends and I was living at a home I needed to get out of, so we did. He makes fun of me a slight amount because I visit my family often. I want to let my mom know I stay in touch. I don't agree with her life choices, but I know she's never going to change. As far as my father goes, we remain distant.
On a side note though, the house we are currently living at is lovely, and has a waterfront view of a lake.
6.) Promotion: It was and it wasn't a promotion. It was a monetary promotion, but not a promotion of power. I'm a pharmacy technician now, and I absolutely detest my job. The only reason why I did so was I needed to make money so we could move out, and I knew they would let me join the pharmacy since they were short staffed. Our pharmacy is horrible and feels more like a prison of first graders than anything. All of the girls are always in bad moods and forever talking shit on each other. No one wants to follow what needs to be done and instead just fights on what they want to do. The district manager has come in multiple times and nothing is improving. I've begged to get out of there, but of course management wants me to stay back there because I try imposing the workflow on everyone and I don't allow anyone to walk on me. The customers are either great or horrible compared to the clientele I used to work with. I've gotten called a fucking stupid bitch by someone on one day and gotten offered chocolate and told that I should be a nurse for being so nice on another day. There's no in between. I talked to my manager last night, and I told her this isn't working out and she's going to meet with her assistant store manager today. I don't know exactly what that means for me, but I guess I'll see when I come in today.
7.) A Semester Break: I took off a semester. It just was too much with moving and work to enroll in classes and knowing I probably won't have enough time to complete them. I caught a lot of shit from my parents for doing this, but it had to be done. If I failed one more class I would be dismissed. Max is disappointed and thinks I dropped out because of him, but I was doing horribly before I even met him. If anything, this break has given me time away to step back and reevaluate a few things. Working at a job I hate has taught me I really don't want to be doing this for the rest of my life.
So...yeah. I've changed a lot since high school and freshman year at college. I don't know what the future holds for me anymore, but I feel like I've become so much older. I just keep on thinking to myself, "Is this what it really means to be an adult?" I'm tired all the time and don't feel like doing much of anything. But I know I need to change a few things. I can't keep doing this forever.
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