Kinda Want to Cry, Kinda Ready for This Year to Be Over

I just found out a "friend" from last year has cut off all ties with me.

I'm not sure why. I was looking for a certain photo on Facebook and I came across one that I didn't remember and I just so happened to see who liked it. Friend's name was on it and it said "Add as Friend". I checked my Instagram and Snapchat and she has me blocked on both.

I'm just really confused. I didn't do anything to her. She stopped talking to a lot of us when she got a girlfriend but all of my friends from last year are still friends with her and she's all over their snapchats and instragrams. The one time I saw her this year she glared at me as I waved hello.

I'm upset about this. My roommate told me not to worry because my roommate was cut off too but "[she] didn't really like her and you're much more of a better person than she is." But still. I'm confused on what I could have possibly done to make her cut me off. I know when I first met everyone last year some of them were caught off guard with how "Chicago" (their words) I was because they're all from small towns in Wisconsin and just aren't used to people as "socially aware and happy and boisterous" as me (that came off a lot more conceited than I wanted and I actually don't wanna sound conceited. But this is what they told me. Apologies). Friend was definitely one of the people caught off guard too but as soon as we all learned how to live with one another I thought she was fine.

It's just validating this belief I have in my head that my friends from last year didn't really like me and were just dealing with me. It's making me more upset than it really should be but I can't get it out of my head. Maybe I'll call up Roommate From Last Year to meet up and chat. We saw each other by accident Friday and caught up and it was just like talking to an old friend again.

And my roommate from this year and I were having a late night chat last night and she really wants me to go talk to someone because she thinks I may possibly have OCD. I don't wanna go around diagnosing myself so I'm just putting it out there that I don't know if I have it. Maybe? Maybe not? But I hope I don't because then that's one less thing to be thrown at me.

I was also informed by Best Friend that Ex-Best Friend apparently wants to talk to me again. He was going to during American Horror Story because that was our thing and he wanted to know how I felt about it. He still wants to known what I think.

I'm just ready for sophomore year to be over to be honest. Sometimes I wish college never happened.
December 4th, 2016 at 08:40pm