Unsent Letter

Often I find myself lying on the warm hood of my car gazing at the stars above as twilight fades. A sense of fear consistently overcomes me as I contemplate how something so vastly beautiful can be filled with many unanswerable questions. A fearsome, fascinating chaos. You are those stars for me here on Earth. Every step and sway is filled with impulse and uncertainty, defined by the fleeting moments of your surroundings. In our cruel game, nervous desire is your Queen while my courageous Knight desperately searches for answers. Like an innocent puzzle whose pieces are scattered over distances that require a pass to your inaccessible heart and mind. My body aches for you and yet, to run to you is an emotional obligation my body does not obey. Falling into your beautiful chaos is a passionate fantasy that often plagues my mind into believing the warmth of our touch will spread across our bodies and our hearts would kiss once more. Panic engulfs me for I cannot see the lonely, shallow pit where your heart lies. My veins are flooded with fortitude and fervently persuades my mind to battle all odds to save you from yourself. My chest is heavy and the air seems to escape my lips. As emotional chaos ensues in my heart and mind, my body remains shaken but not budged. If a rose were cast into shadows as a seedling, it would surely wither away if it did not attempt to reach the light. I remember this as I’m gazing at those distance stars, and you. I am incomplete without your deep blue eyes peering through to my soul but I must stand fast least we both fall into darkness. I must plant my feet as the willow stands against the wind. Someday our pieces will fit together as if they were never scattered. It may take the burning desire of 1,000 suns to unearth the pieces you are missing. My love for you is like when the Sun crisps the land at dawn, letting everyone know he still remembers. I am easy to find like a single lit candle in dark room. When you find yourself, you’ll find me as well, still standing against the wind.