Would You Rather Someone Asked You Your Preferred Pronouns?

I was talking with my coworkers about this person who works at the convenience store across the street. I haven't met them yet, but the girls here seem to love them. From what I'm told, this person "looks like a man, wears men's clothing, but wears make-up, and their name tag says Monica." (I've changed their name for their privacy.)

Now, my first question to my coworkers was, "Do you know this person's preferred pronouns? That way you don't have to keep referring to them as 'this person'?"

And everyone got offended that I asked that.

Let me just fill you in just in case this isn't known about me. My gender is an amalgamation of both extremes, yet neither at the same time. I've identified as genderfluid, genderqueer, nonbinary, and agendered in the past. It all depends on who I'm speaking with and how they question genders and gender roles. I've found that people relate all of these terms with being transgender (so that's another thing).

So being this amalgamation of all these terms, I'm often misgendered. And I've gotten over the fact that I'll always be misgendered.

But, with being misgendered, I don't like to assume genders of other people. That's why I asked my coworkers if they knew this person's preferred pronouns that they got offended about.

I told them straight up, "Ladies, I'm misgendered every day, and I would rather not misgender others. I would prefer to be asked what my preferred pronouns are before someone decides incorrectly for me."

TL;DR: Would you rather someone asked you your preferred pronouns, or is it better that someone doesn't ask?

Have a great afternoon, you guys, hope your Labor Day Weekend is good (for all you Americans); and have a great weekend for my non-American friends!!

~ Felix