I Put a Ring On It.

We went to the store today and I was looking at engagement rings with my boyfriend. This was a terrible idea because I’m ready to be engaged and for some reason, he’s not and I know that. I’m trying my best to be patient because I don’t want to force an engagement, I really don’t. But every time we do talk about it, his reason for not proposing to me yet is because we can’t afford a wedding which is false.

First off, like I’ve told him many times, I wouldn’t want to get married until at least two years after he proposed because I would need to plan everything. Second, we both have like three friends each and just family that would attend, his side is much bigger than mine which it would still be like 50 people maximum. Third, we’d have at least TWO years to save for that.

We’ve been together four years now, we have two children together and we aren’t looking at any serious relationship issues that most people might have. I want to spend the rest of my life with him and he wants the same so why can’t he propose?

My finger feels so empty now. Like I just want to tie a ribbon around it so I can stop thinking about it. It’s weird how I can feel that something is missing when that something was only on my finger for five seconds. I don’t know, I just can’t stop thinking about it and had to get this off my chest because despite the good day we’ve had, I now feel alone and upset over something I pressed even though I knew this is how it would go.

Am I wrong to want to be married? I get that now, most people just talk or hang out or hook up but we have made a family together, we’ve experienced so much together and I love him. I don’t want to just be a baby mama or a girlfriend, I’m ready to be his wife or at least his fiancé.
October 18th, 2017 at 03:34am