Empty Inside

You’d think after so many changes I’ve made to better myself that I would actually find myself beautiful. And for some time, I did. But you tore all that away. I get that I fucked up. But things have been steady. Great. No fights, nothing. Yet you still don’t want to kiss me, hold me, or even touch me. It’s been a week since you’ve been intimate with me. Each time I try I get pushed away, is it me? Or you? Am I overreacting like always? Cause you rejecting me makes me feel ugly. Worthless. Disgusting. I keep telling myself I won’t cry over you anymore, but I do. I’m stupid to have fallen for you when I know your heart will never be mine.