Adderall

I'm sorry I could not come up with a more creative title. But I just got to get out what is on my mind, and organize my thoughts before I see the psychiatrist in an hour.

My therapist is telling me I have ADD/ADHD. I know there is a difference between the two, but I can't remember which one he said. I'm leaning towards ADD. He told me I should of known this years ago, and have been deprived of treatment and functioning in my life. He said he is going to send a report to my psychiatrist so she will give me adderall(or some type of medication for this). Now, I really like my therapist. He is a bit weird, but he is really good and I trust him.

I have a big problem with adderall though. Mostly because of my ex. He was an adderall. He would double, tripple, and even quadruple his adderall. He just basically popped them all day, and all night. He said it helped him lose a lot of weight, and he would share them with his friends and they stay up for days doing big computer projects. He also told me his strong opinion that adderall is just legalized meth. I was offered adderall when I was still with him. I told the doctor it was out of the question. Why? Because I was afraid my ex(Who I lived with at the time) would steal them from me(like he did to his father) and begin to abuse them again.

I told my therapist all of this. His reply?
My boyfriend clearly doesn't have ADHD if he did that. You only get high of this medication if you don't have the condition, or snorting it. And I believe my boyfriend would snort it because he also had a cocaine addiction.

I don't know if these feelings are still in the back of my mind? But I am honestly terrified to take this. I don't know why. Only my ex is the logical reason why I'm so against this medication. I am afraid I will get high off my a** because I don't have this condition(d*mn, talk about paranoid, right?).

But what if this medication helps me? What if it changes my life because I'm able to do things efficiently now?

I don't know, I'm mostly just scared by this whole thing. I will tell the psychiatrist all this though.

Thoughts?