My Mom and My Grandpa

Trigger Warning for the following: death, car accidents, and injuries.

2020 was horrible for all of us, and honestly for me it has been worse the worse year of my life. I had written a blog on here (but deleted it) but I didn’t really go full into detail about my thoughts and feelings.

On September 24th, my grandpa died of a non covid related lung issue, and honestly, I wasn’t really sad, and it was because I knew he was going. My therapist had told me I was mourning way before he even died and that’s why I wasn’t as sad.

Now fast forward to October 16th, my mom, my grandma, and me got into a car accident going to a bakery before we picked up my aunt form work. We had just cashed their checks, and we were turning to go to the bakery when a car t-boned us. Unfortunately, my mom was dead in front of me, and I didn’t even know it.

I would never wish that on anybody, and yes I broke 3/4 ribs, I have nerve damage, and fractured my hand. But I would take those over never having my mother in my life. I miss her, and I wish things were different.

I actually started to feel guilty with how much I was sad with my mom over my grandpa, but my therapist said that it was normal. I know my grandpa was going, my mom, however wasn’t something I’d ever except. Idk, I just miss her
April 18th, 2021 at 04:28am