Fed Up

I understand the fact that I am a grown ass adult. But for fuck's sake, how hard is it to just send a simple text?! My own mother couldn't even seem to remember her oldest daughter's birthday. Yes, my niece had her birthday party on the same day, and I am out of state. But still, a simple text would have sufficed. However, I couldn't even get that much from my own mother. I don't exist to her.

My kids and I are a fleeting fancy whenever she feels the urge to seem like mother or mamaw of the year. She only wants to spend time with us when it suits her or makes her look good. But that's cool. What goes around, comes around. The next time I am home for a visit, am I gonna call or text her? Surely fucking not. I'll be sure to visit my mamaw and my dad and my husband's family. And when she learns, too late, that we were there, she'll ask me, "Why didn't you call me?" My answer? "Why would I call you, when you never answer the damn phone? Why would I waste my time? Why would I get my kid's hopes up? I'll pass, thanks."

I am so sick and tired of not being "good enough" for my mom and her new family. Fuck her and fuck everyone else. I am done. I've finally had it. I want nothing more to do with her. At all. From now on, she wants to talk to me or see my kids, she can fucking call me. End of story. She doesn't like it? Oh fucking well. I'm not gonna keep getting my kid's hopes up, only for her to disappoint them. Hell no. As their mother, it's my job to protect my kids. And if that means I have to protect them from the blatant disregard from my mother, so be it.