Friends

Right now, i have four friends who i know and love. But there is a light problem, the two closest to me, have both let me down, and i dont feel as close to them anymore, i suppose its mutual. I just feel so alone.
My best friend, Julie, she's pretty cool and a better friend, but from time to time, she gets sorta pissy and then the last thing you'd want to do, is piss her off. She's not that bad, but i just feel like she doesn't understand me anymore. She has this nasty habit of calling all bands that i listen to emo, calling me emo, and just plain doubting my decisions and what not, and it gets on my nerves and it hurts. I dont do any of that to her, and i've told her many many times, that i'd appreciate it, if she's stop, but so far, she has just said, that people give her that, so why should she stop. The thing is, i dont give her critique or anything of the kind unless i feel like i need to insult her, and i never do. She just doesnt understand me anymore, i'm afraid. Yet i dont want to break up our friendship... i've grown accustomed to her and i love her presence, she's just so fuckin dear to me(excuse the profanity).
My other best friend, Sven. He's a nice bloke, we had a friends with benefits scenario somewhere in april - may but since he got together with his girlfriend again, things just havent been the same... i suppose he doesnt like me anymore, not even as a friend, although he means the world to me, and i'd give anything to gain his respect when it comes to my guitar skills. I know i'm better than him, but i need to him to say it. He said i was better at english than him, which means alot, since he's finishing high school and he's in the English College in our capital city... He said that about my vocabulary, it meant the world to me. Yet again, i've come to think that he doesnt understand nor respect me anymore, and i loved his company, although i dont get to enjoy that very often, and i miss him and i think a part of me still loves him from time to time.
Maddy, my bestest bestest most dearest friend, you mean the world to me, she understands me, she respects my guitar skills, she respects my drawings, my writings, she never said anything that would hurt me and when she does, i know that its not meant like it, and that i am as dear to her as she is to me.
I wont go into my fourth friend, but i hope you got the idea of whats troubling me.
November 5th, 2007 at 03:14am