Incest

I think I love my cousin more than a cousin. She's like amazing. I love her so much. Yet, she doesn't know it. I watched her cry and go through heartbreak. I couldn't but help to think "All you need is me." But I know she's against incest. I don't even know what to do anymore. She's always so playful with me. She'll like slap my butt or grab my boobs for fun, but she thinks it doesn't affect me. Well, it does. I don't even know what to do about it. I remember when I was in the process of getting a boyfriend; I didn't know how to kiss. So she tried to help me out. When she kissed me...I couldn't breathe right and its like, fireworks went off. I never got that feeling from anyone else. Neither of us are allowed to date, but we do it anyway. And then I think about how it would be if we were together. Our parents wouldn't suspect anything and everything would be so easy. I can only dream about that though. No matter how many times she hurts my feelings or how many times we argue...I can never stay mad, and I always come crawling back to her. I've known her my whole life. She knows everything about me. I know we're perfect for eachother, but we're cousins. And that's incest. It hurts me to know that we could never be together. But maybe I'm wrong about this whole situation. Maybe I just really love her a lot. Maybe I'm lying to myself.