I'm Lily

Well, I officially feel like a piece of shit.

I got a call from a friend of mine. We've known each other forever and we're like siblings. He calls me to ask if there was anything he could do to be a better boyfriend.

Shit.

I knew this was coming. He thought we were going out and for a period of time, so did I. I know he liked me and i sorta liked him so yeah. We promised to be friends if we ever broke up though (although break up is not the words we used) but I just sort of thought it faded.

Then, we were in the car together and he asks if he can hold my hand. Aww, sweet... crap. what was I supposed to say "No thanks?" His mom was driving, like that could happen. So i feel terrible the whole time, trying to think of something I could say to let him get the message that I didn't like him like that.

So, when I got the call, i just spilled my guts and told him that I thought of him more like a brother and that it would be weird dating him and all that crap.

Now I feel like the bad guy in one of those love stories that breaks the boy's heart and his love goes unrequitted. Snape/Lily much.

Since it shares so many similarities with that story i felt like such a hypocrite. I'm that die-hard Snape fangirl who thinks he should have gotten Lily but now I'm not so sure. I'm Lily and I just broke his heart. I hate doing that. Hurting people and all. And I just had to do it to one of my closest friends.

My choices now are to either go out with the Snape of my life... or wait around for the James that will break his heart all over again.