I have officially written the most disgusting song ever. Well, "song" is putting it loosely. More of a crimp, really, รก la The Mighty Boosh.
I was revising for biology, trying to remember things and soonsoforthetceteraetcetera, so I thought that putting the things that I couldn't remember in songs would help. And it did and all! I was crimping here, crimping there, crimping diagonal, crimping hexagonal...I was a Crimp Master. That was, until my brethren walked in on the masterpiece and possibly the hit single, "Ovaries and Scrotums."
Lyrics:
Ovary, ovary,
Eggs in the ovaries.
Oviduct, oviduct,
Tubes for the eh-eggs.
Cervix, cervix,
Neck of the uterus.
Vagina, 'Gina,
The muscular tube thing...
You can sort of guess how the rest of it goes. The second verse is dedicated to the wonderful workings of the penis. I know, it is scary that I need to remember how these work. But fuck yese. I'm slow and proud. :D
I was sort of thinking about recording them. They'd chart well, I think. It's only a work in progress yet, but here's the track list for "Olivia's Bio-crimping Supercool CD".
1. Osmosis Will Kill You In The End
2. Sex Cells; A Tale Of Two Gametes
3. Ovaries And Scrotums
4. The Differences Between Organisms And Orgasms.
5. 46 Chromosomes On The Wall
6. Dave, The Lonely Homosexual Kidney
7. There's A Hole In My Visking Tubing
8. "I Am Biodegradable." (I Am Also An Onion)
This is as close to "silly spam" as I'm ever going to get. Haha...that sounds like "silly sperm".
I'm spending way too much time with my textbook. I feel sick :)
Not registered?
Create an account