stressed

normally im not one to rant but this needed to be said...
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
are you really that blind? do you honestly not see me standing here infront of you? im practically screaming out I LOVE YOU!!!! you dont seem to notice. im too afraid to ask you if you feel the same. im to afraid that you'll say no. and i dont want to feel rejected by you. not when i know if i keep my mouth shut and wait for you to ask me it will be easier. but deep down inside me i know the only thing to do is ask you. if i wait for you to ask me i might be waiting forever. so i tried to wait and be absoultey sure that you loved me too. then just when i was getting up the courage to ask you, you go and say something or do something that makes me think differently. It makes me feel like maybe it was just a moment we had and im taking it as something more than it actually is. this is so confusing. i keep trying to tell myself that the worst thing that could happen is you could say no. i would move on and the WORLD WILL KEEP SPINNING.but when im actaully with you and try and tell myself this it feels like the world would most deffinately stop spinning if you ever said no. YOU ARE MY WORLD.as pathetic as that might sound its true.but im starting to get tired of interpting everything you say and do. im tired of trying to decode everything you say. at first i didnt mind it, it was kinda fun,almost like a game. but that game got old. now its just a game that i think im playing with myself.and im losing