He's mine, but do I want it to stay like that.

Okay so I have a boyfriend now. It hasn't even been that long. Sure we've talked for a couple months before going out, but now that he's actually my boyfriend I can't really accept that. I feel like I'm not good enough. It makes me nervous to know someone else is there and that I'm accountable for possibly hurting someone. It's funny it was so easy to give advice on this, but now that I have one I can't do it. Some days I just think it's too much. At first he had put it up to me on whether we'd date or not or we'd take it slow, but I asked him what he wanted and of course you know what he chose and I knew he wouldn't be that patient so I went with it even though I wasn't so sure. He's my first boyfriend and I don't really know how to handle these feeling. I get all nervous when he texts me or I just see him. And I don't like feeling vulnerable I guess. And I just feel like I can't control how I feel anymore and it's scarying me. It's finally hit me I guess that for the first time possibly I have no control over this. I don't know what I'm asking for, but this is how I feel right now and I just needed to let it out somewhere.