&&I love you!

Note to Reader: This is for me, guys. If you're reading it, that's great, but this is for me. I've noticed that I've been a little off lately. My mom has noticed too, and she's worried, and that makes me feel like the scum of the earth. So this is for every time I'm not quite right. It's something to bring me up to par, I guess. It's something to remind me that even though I can't change everything and everyone, I can still change myself for the better.

I love making a joke, and being terrified no one is going to laugh because it was a pretty lame joke, and they end up thinking it's hilarious. Or when it's the other way around. For some reason I find that pretty funny, too.

I love lakes that aren't Lanier.
Maybe that's a metaphor for something.

I love how impossibly loud and crunchy Ohhs are.

I love messing with html.

I love not knowing when to shut up.

I love that people can call a RuneScape avatar hot, and the person actually takes it as a compliment.
I love that I was embarrassed to tell my best friend that I played RuneScape.

I love that I pretend to talk on my cell phone to avoid looking like a wimp.
I love that I am a wimp.

I love that I am obsessed with Stargate. Obsessed.
I love that when my sister comes home, we eat tuna casserole and watch Big Bang Theory and Stargate and Law & Order all night long.
I love that I fantasize about SciFi shows.

I love that everyone makes fun of me for trying to be virtuous.
I love that it doesn't stop me.

I love when my parents make fun of me for saying it's bedtime.
I love that Dad is exactly like Nana, but he'll never realize it, or admit it.
I love that Mom has approximately eight billion pairs of reading glasses, and that no two are the same.
I love that they care so much, even when I'm grumpy.

I love that I'm only happy when people don't want me to be.
I love that you think you can bring me down.
I love optimism.

I love roller coasters.
I love that that's half a lie.

I love that I'm so vain sometimes.

I love that I really don't give a jellybean's hindquarters what they think.
I love that that one is half a lie too. Jellybeans don't have hindquarters. So that means I don't give anything for their opinions. Ouch.

I love that my best friend is the one that usually brings me down. Mostly because I value what he thinks too much.

I love how ridiculously long this blog is getting.

I love that I'm writing this in the middle of the History Center. I feel like I'm making history. Like if I'm ever famous, or dead, or infamously dead, or anything, people are going to care what I loved or didn't.

I love humanity. Everything about it.
I love the fragility.
I love the predictability, and at the same time, the way it's impossible to predict what we will do next.
I love being scared.

I love time.
I love impossibilities.

I love clothes that aren't hand-me-downs.

I love you!

I love babysitting, even if I am adamant about not liking little kids.
I love earning my own money.
I love pretending to be responsible.

I love writing.
I love exaggerating.

I love dreaming.

I love that you think I care when you tell me I'm off pitch.
I love singing.

I love closed captioning.

I love waking up right at ten every morning.

I love air conditioning.

I love Lola and Colonel and Jules and Fattikus.

I love paradoxes.

I love watching How It's Made and not feeling like a total dork.

I love outer space and astronomy and physics and how I don't think I'll ever be an astronaut or a cosmonaut.

I love math. I love how there is always a right answer, and how there are so many different ways to reach that end.
I love that I am not very good at math.

I love hands-on museums like SciTrek.

I love science. I love that there is usually a right answer, but there is still room for interpretation and theories.
I love how we are still searching for answers that may never be put to rest.

I love how there will always be questions.

I love theatre.
I love work calls.
I love dressing up and singing all the time and dancing nonstop, and no one questions it because I'm a drama kid.
I even love the feeling that I might just be a big fish in a small pond.

I love that I won't be on top next year.
I love challenges.

I love upperclassmen.
I love underclassmen.
I love that I can't stand the some of the people in my grade. Although, I suspect that would be the case in whichever grade or school I went to.

I love Homer H. Hickam and Scott Westerfield and William Goldman and Randy Pausch and Barbara Kingsolver.
I love reading.
I love oratory and debate.
I love public speaking in large doses.

I love making a difference.

I love spending all day putting together a playlist, and then realize I hate all of the songs the next day.

I love the Bargers.

I love seeing the look on people's faces when I know all the words to a rap song.

I love being precise. Maybe that's why I'm so bad at cooking.

I love telling a story or joke, but laughing so hard at the very thought of it that I either butcher it or never get it out or people give me funny looks.

I love saying things that make no sense, but people laugh anyway because it's polite.

I love airports. Don't ask me why. I love the smell and the sense of world and the people and the bustle and the rush and the atmosphere.

I love rollerblading.

I love going to shuel.

I love being Jewish. It's not like it's a disease I feel the need to hide from the Great Big Southern Christian World… more like a really cool birthmark I get to show off at school.

I heart NY.

I love nameless soldiers.

I love being surprised by people's kindness.

I love doodling.
I love that I make rough drafts of my doodles.

I love fuzzy socks.

I love squishy pillows.

I love that it's OK to be naughty sometimes.

I love useless facts.

I love this blog.
I love that I can always look at it and feel good.
I love that I will never be finished with it.
I love that there is so much of life to love.
I love that I have barely scratched the surface.