confirmation essay [I don't reccomend reading if you are ooberly relgious because I am not]

I've been dreading this for weeks now. And it was finally due and my mother wouldn't let me go to the movies without writing it ): I'm an atheist but my parents don't know, so they're forcing me to confirm. We had to write an essay about it. Urgggh. Care to read it? I'm sorry if I offend anyone. I was quite pissed off while writing it, since religion bothers me a bit...but here it is! I think it's kind of funny. x]

Hello, I'm Krista [insertlastnamehere]. This will be my Entrance Report to join the Confirmation Program. Entering the Confirmation process is not my decision by far. Personally, I do not want to join at all because I feel there is no need to. I and my family have never been very involved in the church, so I was not much of a religious child. I was brought to church but never understood it, because nothing could be proven. I am entering this by force from my family and my grandmother who will surely disown me if I do not complete my sacraments.

During preparation process I can't say anything I'm hoping will or will not happen. I do not know what is going to happen, because I do not even know what Confirmation is. According to dictionary.com, Confirmation is "a rite administered to baptized persons, in some churches as a sacrament for confirming and strengthening the recipient in the Christian faith, in others as a rite without sacramental character by which the recipient is admitted to full communion with the church." So, after reading that about five times, I'm guessing it will "bring me closer to the church and to my faith". Honestly, I have no idea how you plan on doing that in only twenty classes for two years. However, now that I think of it, something I wish will not happen is that the classes won't be as immensely boring as Religious Education classes have been before.

As for how receiving the sacrament will effect me, I feel it will do nothing at all. I'm sorry, but at the moment I don't feel any joy of even just writing this. I doubt this will enhance my faith or change my life in anyway. I will still be the same person, because I will not let twenty classes of religious ed change who I am. I am doing this for my family, not for myself.

Another phrase I was told to brought up is "The Holy Sprit". This time I won't annoy you with dictionary.com. From all my knowledge of the years, the only thing I recall of Holy Spirit is the tongues of fire over peoples heads, which meant "the birth of the church". And it's the third part of the Trinity. "Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit. What I don't understand is how three "things" can be as one. Just thinking about all this makes my head hurt.

For the last part of this, I'm supposed to list questions I'd like to be answered about confirmation. Sadly, I don't have many questions to ask since everything is quite a blur to begin with. I can't focus on one thing without twenty other questions being asked, and I know half of the questions will be solved with the answer "have faith; beleive". So, I think the only question I have to ask is this;

Are you sure you want such a annoying, pessimestic, unfaithful student in your program?

Sorry if this wasn't what you'd expect (since this is probably the most honest letter you've read),
Krista [instertlastnamehere]