Andrew <3

Andrew was my life, my Love, and my EVERYTHING.
He cheered me up when I was down, he made me laugh when I was sad
he comforted me when I needed it.
he did everything to make me happy. And I did something bad,
someone told me that he was in love with someone else
and they had been in love since they were little.
So I broke up with him [[which I regret. Of every second of every minute of every day]]
then we got into a fight.
the last thing I said to him was
"I hate you and I hope you die" "'and I'll see you in hell"
and he said
"I hope you go to heaven cuz I never want to see/talk to you ever again"
and now he's dead.

I loved him so much, I still do.
More than anything in the world,
nothing can replace him and nothing ever will.

Suicidal thoughts run through my head 24/7
and I wonder if I should
do it.

And then I wonder ... What will everything be like when I'm dead?
What will happen to the people around me?
I don't want them to commit suicide either.
That one question [[should I do it]]
runs through my mind all day.

As tears fill up in my eyes.
i cry, with the morned loss.
And I wonder. When I die, will he still want to be near me?
I'd hope that he would want to be with me
but I guess not bcuz of what I did.

I am such a horrible person
maybe I should Fucking do it!!

Andrew Pandemic
June 6th, 1990 -- July 9th, 2008