Today I had a meltdown.

I thought I would go to the soup kitchen with my grandma, then meet up with some girls to work on a summer English project.
WRONG.

The moment before I go to the soup kitchen,my mom remembers I have a physical right then.
I break down.
I chew my hands raw, I cry. This was not in my plans today. This was not part of my schedule. How will this affect my food plan?
We get to the office, and I can't stop pacing. Up and down, up and down in the waiting room. Everyone probably thinks I'm insane. To calm myself, I look at the white board with random words on it, you know, like for little kids to make sentences. (I still go to a fucking pediatrician, since my mom never bothered to take me to a grown-up doctor.)
I critique the grammar.
"They need just a plain 's' on there."

"What?" My mom had been quiet, probably shocked by my behavior. She didn't hear me.

"They need a 's' magnet. You see how there is a magnet that says 'es'? That way they can make something plural. But that doesn't work with all words, so they need a plain 's'."

My leg hasn't stopped bouncing, and I'm talking in a weird, dreamy voice that isn't mine.

When they call me back, I have to step on the scale backwards. Seeing my weight would send me over the top. Later, my doctor won't shut up, so I get impatient and freak out. The pure thought of all the things I have to do (take off my shorts, get a breast exam) makes me burst into hysterics. Finally, I'm done. I beg my mom to just take me home. I can't handle anything social.

I ended up meeting the girls anyway. I felt better after I calmed down, and ate something.
They probably thought I was crazy too. I was the weird English know-it-all that was sucking down black coffee, among frappacinos.
I'm weird.