The Feeling of Death

Yes, it's a tragic feeling, isn't it?
That heavy weight on your chest, that hard to breathe feeling. It all around stinks.

Today as I was driving to town with my mother and her boyfriend, my thoughts were obsorbed out the car window.
The gentle ripples of the small waves in the ocean caught my eye, and the clear blue sky almost made it seem like life wasn't real. Like I was imagining the whole thing.
When we drove on the high way, the formation of the clouds drew my attention. I couldn't pull my eyes away from them.
Gentle whisps across the sky, it was. The clouds looked almost, but not quiet, transparent. Except, the edges were jagged. Softly, from the sky, but looked like they could slice you if you ran your hand across it. It was very strange.
When I got home, I had this sudden feeling of lightness. Almost like I could float. A weird relief of some sort. But, I felt very dead and unattatched to the world.
Then, I later came to realize, someone I used to be very close with had passed on today.
It took a while to sink in, but it eventually did. I had the heavy feeling in my chest that most get when they loose a loved one. But I still feel very light.
She had passed away from cancer, but I know she passed on peacefully. As much pain as she was in before, I'm almost glad she's in a better place.
Life really is rough when you're sick with that kind of disease. It's more peaceful for them if you just let them go. It's harder for you, because you feel guilt, but try to set it aside and think of the better, pain free place they are in.

I have no idea why, but I feel connected with people that have passed on in an odd sense. Some people, anyways. Though I have never spoke to spirits, I have felt them and seen them. I've read books written by medians, and they are very interesting.
I'm not a professional paranormal researcher, or median in anyway. Please don't think I'm trying to be professional, because I am not. :)