The Most Disturbing Book You've Ever Read.

I haven't read many weird books but I read Memoirs of a Geisha at 12 and was disturbed by some of the stuff in there.

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. I read it two years ago at a very uncertain time of my life. In short, I guess I was having a sort of identity crisis, and reading Plath did little to quell it. Not that I didn't like the book, I just felt very... weird about it. I'd take it into the shower with me, and put the plughole in so that by the time I was done, there'd be enough water in the tub to sit in and read it for hours on end. My mum kept asking if there was anything wrong and I couldn't say for sure if there was or not. I realise that my reaction says more about me, than it does about The Bell Jar but nonetheless, something very peculiar came over me when I read it, and I'm yet to go near it again.

I'm gonna add the Dollenganger series to my list of most disturbing books I've ever read. It's all full of incest and has a lot of religious undertones. It's kinda adorable at times, but it's pretty dark what with a brother and sister falling for each other after being trapped in an attic for a few years and then the sister's son falling for the sibling's grandmother? Yeah, it's full of incest.

I read Unwind when I was 15-16 by Neil Shusterman, which wasn't really all that disturbing in itself, but there is a scene where a character is being unwound and I don't know why, but it was written in such a way that I still find it hard to breath even thinking about that scene 3-4 years later. I've never read that rest of the books or reread it because it was such a powerful image that I want to leave it as is. I'm weird. *shrugs*

I read End Game by Nancy Garden around the same time, which was about a school shooting from the shooter's perspective. I just remembered it ended with this awful feeling like your entire life is over and there's nothing you can do about it.

I guess it's more emotion that sticks with me than dark subject matter. Someone can be brutally murdered and it won't bother me at all in a story, but if you describe the horror that person felt as they were being murdered, I'll remember it forever.

The Freakshow by Bryan Smith.
I still legitimately shudder whenever I think about this book and I kind of wish I hadn't made myself finish reading it. It was depraved AF.

American Psycho by Brett Easton Ellis was pretty messed up. Loved it though. Also Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs is another insane/messed up book. I would have liked it but it was extremely hard to follow. It's written like it's straight from a drug addicts brain with no editing. Like, just long trains of thought and random shit. It's cool but super hard to follow.

I read Stephen King's Misery when I was probably still a bit too young and that spooked me for a solid month; I started seeing humanish shapes in the dark corners of rooms.

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