Has Anyone Else's Parent/s Threatened Suicide?

  • cruciatus.

    cruciatus. (455)

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    So last night, my Dad got really plastered (he's a really bad alcoholic) and woke my brother up at one o'clock in the morning. He demanded that my brother--who doesn't even have a license yet--drive him to the gas station to get some cigarettes because he was out of them. Then when they got home, he forced my little brother to make food for him because he was too drunk and he couldn't figure out the stove. When my brother told him that it was the middle of the night and he was trying to sleep, my Dad just got really mad and told him,

    'You should be doing these things for me, you know, because in six months I'm not going to be alive!'

    This isn't the first time my Dad's done this, either. About four years or so ago, when my brother was too little to understand what was fully going on (He was ten and we kept him sheltered) my Dad went completely haywire and ran off in the middle of the night. The only things he took with him were a bottle of whiskey and a shotgun or a riffle, we're still not sure which. He called my Mom at three o'clock in the morning threatening to shoot himself. He was in a ditch somewhere along the highway, and the cops couldn't find him because he was in a good spot, I guess. He told my Mom that unless she got all of his siblings at our house in 3 hours, he'd shoot himself while on speaker phone, regardless of whether or not my brother and I were in the room and could hear it. We got all of my aunts and uncles to our house in the three hours, and my Dad went through a list that took two hours on the phone to get through, blaming everyone for everything. He had actually taken the time to write out suicide notes for all of us in the family---one for me, one for my brother (who never managed to see it, thank God) and one for my Mom, blaming her for everyhing too, saying that she was a witch and turned him into a suicidal jackass.

    The reason I'm putting this post up is because I'm seriously worried about the wellbeing of my little brother. He's only sixteen, and he has no idea what's really going on. He was sheltered from everything that happened four years ago, all he knows is that Daddy went on a short fishing trip. He doesn't know that my father was suicidal. He called my mother last night hysterical, just crying his eyes out.

    I don't know what to do, and I would really appreciate any advice someone could give me on what I can do to help.
    December 21st, 2009 at 10:21am
  • TeenCadburyDream

    TeenCadburyDream (100)

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    I agree, that he's only sixteen and no one should really go through something like this, but maybe he has to stop being sheltered at some point?
    I mean, when did you start realising exactly what your Dad was? Maybe (I don't know the full story so advice might be awful) you need to tell your brother the truth, so that he understands what's going on instead of being confused.

    The only time my mum ever threatened to commit suicide was different, because she threatened to kill me at the same time as well. I was only 9, and she always threatened me with things like this when I was young, especially when no one else was around. The problem with me was that I thought it was completely normal for parents to do that to their children, and I blamed myself. It was my older brother who convinced me that I worth something, which is why I always think of him as my parent as well.
    December 23rd, 2009 at 05:45am
  • cruciatus.

    cruciatus. (455)

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    TeenCadburyDream:
    I agree, that he's only sixteen and no one should really go through something like this, but maybe he has to stop being sheltered at some point?
    I mean, when did you start realising exactly what your Dad was? Maybe (I don't know the full story so advice might be awful) you need to tell your brother the truth, so that he understands what's going on instead of being confused.

    The only time my mum ever threatened to commit suicide was different, because she threatened to kill me at the same time as well. I was only 9, and she always threatened me with things like this when I was young, especially when no one else was around. The problem with me was that I thought it was completely normal for parents to do that to their children, and I blamed myself. It was my older brother who convinced me that I worth something, which is why I always think of him as my parent as well.
    I agree that he probably shouldn't be sheltered like this anymore; the only thing I'm scared about is that I don't want him getting hurt like I did. I was twelve when my dad did this last time, and I saw everything happen. And it hurt me badly; it changes your perspective of life. It's been a few days since this newest incident hapepned, and while my little brother now knows at least a little bit of what happened last time, he doesn't know everything, and probably won't be enlightened. I don't want him to have to go through the fear that would keep him up all night, wondering if his father was going to be dead the next morning. I don't want him to have to go to school and put up with teasing and torments from his classmates because his father is "psycho". Even moreso; I don't want him to end up bottling all of his feelings up, like I did, and become depressive to the point of self-harm.
    Thank you for your advice, though; I really appreciate it.
    December 23rd, 2009 at 09:05am
  • sexandcandy

    sexandcandy (100)

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    My mom once almost overdosed on her pain killers while drunk, my dad was on a business trip and my mom took that as an opportunity to get drunk, she kicked my sisters out of the house and a family friend took me in for the week. I was only ten so I had no idea what was going on when all of the police cars and fire trucks pulled up. I figured out what happened less than a year later when I was 11. Not 16.

    I think you shouldn't be sheltering your brother who is only one year younger than you if you knew about it before you were 16 why can't your brother know. Not that it is a good ting to know, but it's better than all the confusion and him flushing you with questions. You should try and convince your dad to go to AA meetings and get rid of or hide all of the guns, and/or knifes that could potentially kill him. I honestly think it's the alcohol that is giving him the suicide thoughts, but I'm no therapist. Hope that helps. :)
    December 25th, 2009 at 01:11am
  • cruciatus.

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    XxMaddisaurxX:
    My mom once almost overdosed on her pain killers while drunk, my dad was on a business trip and my mom took that as an opportunity to get drunk, she kicked my sisters out of the house and a family friend took me in for the week. I was only ten so I had no idea what was going on when all of the police cars and fire trucks pulled up. I figured out what happened less than a year later when I was 11. Not 16.

    I think you shouldn't be sheltering your brother who is only one year younger than you if you knew about it before you were 16 why can't your brother know. Not that it is a good ting to know, but it's better than all the confusion and him flushing you with questions. You should try and convince your dad to go to AA meetings and get rid of or hide all of the guns, and/or knifes that could potentially kill him. I honestly think it's the alcohol that is giving him the suicide thoughts, but I'm no therapist. Hope that helps. :)
    Thank you for the advice, as well. We've tried convincing him to go to AA, but you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped, and you can't force someone who doesn't want to be sober to get sober. We all know that. I know that he shouldn't be sheltered, but he has a pretty fragile mindset; when it comes to my father, Conner still acts and behaves as if he's a five year old little kid, and thinks that Daddy knows everything and is his hero. I don't want to ruin that illusion for him, but at the same time I know that it's just fantasy for him, and letting him believe it could hurt him in the long run. We're still trying to figure out what to do as a family.
    December 25th, 2009 at 08:04am
  • sexandcandy

    sexandcandy (100)

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    Kiss Me Deadly.:
    XxMaddisaurxX:
    My mom once almost overdosed on her pain killers while drunk, my dad was on a business trip and my mom took that as an opportunity to get drunk, she kicked my sisters out of the house and a family friend took me in for the week. I was only ten so I had no idea what was going on when all of the police cars and fire trucks pulled up. I figured out what happened less than a year later when I was 11. Not 16.

    I think you shouldn't be sheltering your brother who is only one year younger than you if you knew about it before you were 16 why can't your brother know. Not that it is a good ting to know, but it's better than all the confusion and him flushing you with questions. You should try and convince your dad to go to AA meetings and get rid of or hide all of the guns, and/or knifes that could potentially kill him. I honestly think it's the alcohol that is giving him the suicide thoughts, but I'm no therapist. Hope that helps. :)
    Thank you for the advice, as well. We've tried convincing him to go to AA, but you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped, and you can't force someone who doesn't want to be sober to get sober. We all know that. I know that he shouldn't be sheltered, but he has a pretty fragile mindset; when it comes to my father, Conner still acts and behaves as if he's a five year old little kid, and thinks that Daddy knows everything and is his hero. I don't want to ruin that illusion for him, but at the same time I know that it's just fantasy for him, and letting him believe it could hurt him in the long run. We're still trying to figure out what to do as a family.
    Yeah it was pretty hard for me when i found out about my moms alcoholism. Another thing to do that may or may not be helpful- it depends on who your dad is. Is to have an intervention- maybe to make it easier to set it up the show intervention could be a good thing to do to sign up for it. (I'm not trying to advertise but I've seen how that show helps so many lives) And most of the time interventions give the person an ultimatum and if their sober they might chose the family over the beer
    December 26th, 2009 at 02:15am
  • cruciatus.

    cruciatus. (455)

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    XxMaddisaurxX:
    Yeah it was pretty hard for me when i found out about my moms alcoholism. Another thing to do that may or may not be helpful- it depends on who your dad is. Is to have an intervention- maybe to make it easier to set it up the show intervention could be a good thing to do to sign up for it. (I'm not trying to advertise but I've seen how that show helps so many lives) And most of the time interventions give the person an ultimatum and if their sober they might chose the family over the beer
    I think that's an excellent idea. The thing I'm worried about is that my Dad is a very good actor, and a very good liar. He can lie his way out of any kind of proof. He never throws his bottles away just for the simple fact that if my mom finds one and asks if he's been drinking, he can say 'that was from a long time ago, Kim. Give it a rest.' And even if we know that it hasn't been a long time, it looks that way and he always ends up making my mom look like a bitch and humiliating her.
    December 28th, 2009 at 10:33pm
  • nebulas

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    This has happened to me several times. My father used to threaten to kill himself, he usually blames it on my mother. When we went on a cruise two years ago, he threatened to jump off of the ship and said, "The only reason why I won't jump off of this fucking boat is because of the girls!" He was referring to my sister and I. He has anger problems and diabetes, so when his sugar gets low, he gets crazy.
    December 29th, 2009 at 10:31pm
  • Antagonist

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    My mom used to threaten it alot.

    When I was little...honestly, I dunno how old I was because it's kinda blurry, but I know I wasn't in school yet...I walked in on my mom crying and loading a shotgun and I screamed and ran away crying, and I guess it stopped her from doing whatever she was going to do, because she chased after me telling me to shut up or my dad would hear.

    Then when I was 17 after we found out she had cheated on my dad and done alot of drugs I was mad at her and she was trying to keep it secret from her mom, and one night she and I fought so I went and called her mom and told her EVERYTHING, and Grandma called my mom, and my mom locked herself in the guest bathroom and was going to slit her wrists and my dad had to break down the door.

    There's been alot of other times, but those two are the ones I remember most.
    September 11th, 2011 at 11:13am
  • robbsdead

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    January 17th, 2012 at 09:17pm
  • Red Arrowette

    Red Arrowette (885)

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    I honestly don't know if my mom has ever threatened suicide since i wasn't always around her in my life (I didn' start seeing her as my real mom until I was about 12 when she actually became a physical part of my life--namely when she married my stepdad and had my little brother) and my grandma has been the imprinted mother figure to me. I'm not sure if this counts or not but my grandma has often said, "I'm better off dead," or "I wish I were dead so i wouldn't have to deal with you all." She says that whenever she gets pissed off at her kids (my mom and her siblings), my grandpa, or me, or my twin brother since she's very argumentive and controlling. She's mellowed out and doesnt say shit like that (especially after my aunt and I had set her straight) very often anymore but when she used to say when i was younger, everyone in the family used to be very scared for her but now if she says it, we ignore it (for the most part) because she says it to try and hurt us (my aunt and i came to the conclusion that she's bipolar or has some kind of chemical imbalance in her body/brain that makes her say and do all of the things she does).
    November 14th, 2014 at 07:31pm
  • riottkick

    riottkick (125)

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    My mom did, when she was younger or when I wasn't on medication for Bipolar disorder, and our fights would get out of hand. It wasn't very fun. But now, she doesn't! :3
    November 15th, 2014 at 01:02am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    I was too young to remember my mom's episodes but she was majorly screwed over by a hospital now closed, a doctor who lost his license, Prozac, and false implanted memories. We came to live with my dad because of it. She got the help she needed.
    November 21st, 2014 at 03:08pm
  • solo sunrise

    solo sunrise (260)

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    My dad used to walk around with a rifle and threaten to shoot himself. Sometimes he threatened to shoot my mom at the same time. It got to the point where I had to hide his ammo so that the rifle would be unloaded when he went on his rants. I don't remember when it started, but the last time he did it around me, I was twelve (I no longer live with him). Both my parents have depression and both have attempted suicide at some point.
    November 29th, 2014 at 07:23am