Should Parents Raise Their Child(ren) Into a Religion?

Chaos Walking:

the kind of parents who 'shove religion down their child's throat' are completely different from normal parents who raise children into a religion

Chaos Walking:

except for one Priest who is, I suppose, a 'typical' Christian

Does this seem contradictory to you?

(side-note, you should head here to set your post-design, so you don't have to include the coding in every post)

@ Chaos Walking
Perhaps I should point out that my secondary school was also secular, and we were also taught about all the main religions in RE. :)

It's just that by the time I was in Year 7, I was open to so much more information about Christianity (the issues that aren't really brought up with younger children by parents and primary school teachers). So it was like I built on my already-existing knowledge of it at the time, and without thinking I just added these beliefs to my worldview just because they were part of Christianity. I didn't really think to question them.

Our RE textbooks in particular dealt with issues that certain religions involve strong beliefs about (abortion, sex outside of marriage, homosexuality, masturbation, etc.), and I started to get awful cognitive dissonance about things; particularly the latter two subjects that I just bracketed, as I was beginning to mature sexually and find that I was curious about boys.

It was only when I got to about 15/16 (incidentally the time when I had almost entirely lost my faith) that my parents would talk about such subjects in a religious context.

@ pravda.
By ‘typical Christian’ I meant the perception that all Christians believe that homosexuality is wrong and that every Christian believes every story, such as Adam and Eve. He believes in every law of the Bible, no matter how morally wrong nowadays, and preaches it during Mass. By a normal parent I meant someone whose beliefs are neutral and who does have their own ideas about certain topics.

@ Alex; periphery.
Oh, then I suppose we were just extremely uneducated in religion in primary school
We were never given the chance to study the worldwide topics such as the ones you bracketed, and it still hasn’t been brought up in our high school religious lessons when we study Christianity. It’s been left up to us to form our opinions on those things. I was actually shocked when I realised that one of the major reasons people were homophobic was to do with religion, since I’d never been taught about that, and I was shocked at how people of my own religion believed in that. I have an uncle who is gay, and he’s a Catholic, so I thought it couldn’t even be possible that religion was really what they were all arguing over.

My opinions on those topics is something I’ve only ever told anyone on the internet. I would like to hear what my classmates and parents believe about them though, since we’ve all had such different upbringings.

Let kids have a choice. I was raised to be a very strong Christian, and that's what led me into a rebellion. The way I see it, kids have two choices; they can either go to church or they can not go to church. It lets kids know that you're still in charge, but they still have the freedom to make up their own mind. -A

I was raised to be Christian but we were never very religious. Obviously, I drifted from the faith and I am now Agnostic. I don't really see a problem with raising a child into a certain religion as long as the parents are flexible and will let the child switch their religion or have no religion if they eventually choose too. I'm not really sure on that second one. I don't know if I would raise my own children into a certain religion or not, or if I would simply let them choose. It seems that a lot of these questions really have no right or wrong answer, just different perspective.

I think it's okay to raise a child into a "This is what we believe" kind of thing, but not "this is the ultimate truth," if that makes sense. Dogma is a very dangerous thing to impose on a child who isn't yet ready or able to make their own decisions on things so complex.

Personally, with my own children someday, I would like to show them the beliefs of many people and let them decide for themselves which, if any, they want to follow.

Teaching a child about religion isn't a bad thing at all. I just think it should be done in a way that the child understands it isn't the only belief or the only possibility, so that they can eventually make their own decision, and not feel like it's dangerous to make one that conflicts with the parents' views.

I want my children to go to Sunday School and Bible School until they're old enough to decide they do/don't want to go anymore. I think that sort of thing is fun for kids. They would only go to a church I personally felt comfortable sending them to. I'm not sure if I'd let my young children go to church with a friend if I hadn't attended the church.

I'm not scared of religion in general, just the possibility of spiritual abuse.

I see nothing wrong with raising a child into a religion as long as you're not shoving it down their throats.

I was raised in a very strict Catholic home and my mom was always trying to force me to go to my CCD classes.

Do you think it's ethically/morally right to raise a child into a certain religion from birth?: Its not right or wrong to raise a child in a religion as long as you don't bring them up close-minded to the world around them and intolerant of whats different. I have a very close friend that I can't bring around my other friends because she was raised super religious, home schooled, and her friends pretty much hand picked by her parents. I can't bring her around because she doesn't believe gay marriage is right [calls them fags], she's completely intolerant but she is one of the most giving and kind people I know.

Do you think religion is necessary to any extent for a child growing up?: It itsn't nessesary as long as you raise a child so they understand that they can be however good or bad they want without religion being an excuse. That they make their own path and their own choices and that if they want to believe in a higher power its up to them.

Its hard for me to believe sometimes how parents can force their children into a mold of their making.

I was raised loosely Christian, and though I attended a Christian school from Kindergarten to fourth grade, I never even thought about what the Bible said until I was older. Even that young, I was okay with gay people. Honestly, I was just like, oh, okay, that guy is kissing a guy, that's cool. It never occurred to me anything was not right or different or odd until later, when I was listening to these Christian kids talk about how being gay was morally wrong because it was in the Bible.

I'm Agnostic now. I believe that, whatever God exists, he loves people in general. All of us. He makes straight people and gay people and bi people and pan people like me, and binary romantics and everything else. I even believe he makes transsexual people, intending them to go through the trial of discovering who they are and doing what they want about it. That's what I'm going to teach my kids.

When I deviated away from what I kinda sorta was, I was fine with it, and when I realized I was pansexual, I told my mom, and she understood, and that was it. She raised me to know what was wrong and what was right, and that was that. I think, ultimately, it made me a happier person. I have friends who were raised under a religion and were just lashed by their parental figures for being gay or bi or trans or anything else. And it's just... They're miserable.

I think it's important to teach kids there's some sort of higher power because, in my opinion, there's just too many things in this world we can't explain with science or logic or fact. Things that seem magical and fantastical, and that's whatever God exists doing his thing. But I don't think shoving religion down some poor child's throat is okay. When we're born, we trust our parents implicitly, and I think it's terrible to force them into believing things like deviating from what they were raised to believe to what they believe now is going to send them to some horrible place where they burn in hell.

Ultimately, raising kids with values is nice, but I think we should all have options when we get old enough to start making rational decisions.

I don't have a kid, don't know if I'll have one, but if I did I wouldn't raise them to be religious. The kid probably be exposed to my religion (Wicca) but ultimately I'd want them to be the one who decides if they are religious at all, and if they are, what religion they would want to be a part of. I wouldn't care either way, just as long as they're respectful of others and won't judge others for what they believe/don't believe.

I don't think so parents should raise their children into religion. Let them grow up and decide what beliefs they should have. when they are old enough to make their decisions, they themselves will set their beliefs and thoughts. After all, you cannot force anyone to follow any religion.

I don't think it's that much different than raising a child in say an atheist home. I think it would be difficult if say the parents were religious to simply not raise the child like them because from what I know religions aren't just rules, they are (or should be in the case of Christianity) entire lifestyles.

As they grow older they should get exposure to other people with different beliefs and eventually should be free to choose for themselves. As long as when the child grows up he chooses and thus differentiates between his own faith/beliefs and his parents' then I think it's fine.

@ fell_
My sister was raised in an Atheist home, while I was raised in a Christian home. (We have different fathers.) She was taught to explore and question and learn and discover and figure out what worked for her. We were threatened if we didn't believe the way our parents did. I see a major difference.

@ close dru's eyes.
Wow, I definitely don't agree with being forced to believe in anything because that wouldn't be your own beliefs, they'd be those of whoever was forcing you, I guess in your case, your parents'.

Perhaps my sentence was to sweeping; I was imagining a family that didn't force but simply lived that way so for christians, they all go to church, maybe read the bible together, go to church events etc. but in an atheist family they simply wouldn't engage in any form of religious activity or at least not for religious purposes. When they grow up they can do whatever they wanted. But each family is different and family relations is more complicated than that so generalising Atheist and Religious homes won't work. Point taken.

However, although Atheism (or at least explicit Atheism which I assume we're talking about) isn't a religion I think it should still be treated in a similar way because it's the specific set of beliefs that there AREN'T any gods etc. (rather than simply not knowing) so that's why I thought there wouldn't be much difference, because they'll each be living in their own culture of beliefs be it that x god(s) exist and no others do or that no gods exist at all.

@ fell_
And I'm sure there are some Atheist parents who would laugh at a child who developed a belief in God. Mine just weren't that way. (In fact, my sister went to Bible school because my parents liked the church so much despite being Atheists. Everyone there was nice and no one judged.) My sister grew up on military bases surrounded by multitudes of faiths and cultures, which always helps, I think.

But, yeah, in general the entire situation is more "are these parents equipped to raise their child correctly with or without religion" and the answer is just very subjective and I don't think anything can really be done about it.

What I do know is a lot more religious people kick their gay kids out than Atheist parents.

close dru's eyes.:

But, yeah, in general the entire situation is more "are these parents equipped to raise their child correctly with or without religion" and the answer is just very subjective and I don't think anything can really be done about it.

Agreed.

close dru's eyes.:

What I do know is a lot more religious people kick their gay kids out than Atheist parents.

I think it's really sad that this happens and I physically can't understand it. Whatever my kid was like, gay, disabled mentally or physically, changed beliefs, became a serial killer; it would be hard, but I don't think I would ever kick them out...(except the serial killer, they should go to jail for that), but I wouldn't disown them in any way and I definitely wouldn't stop loving them. <-----I know you didn't say that parents stopped loving their kids, but I know people who have been through this.

fell_:

However, although Atheism (or at least explicit Atheism which I assume we're talking about) isn't a religion I think it should still be treated in a similar way because it's the specific set of beliefs that there AREN'T any gods etc. (rather than simply not knowing) so that's why I thought there wouldn't be much difference, because they'll each be living in their own culture of beliefs be it that x god(s) exist and no others do or that no gods exist at all.

Not believing in God doesn't affect my culture or belief system though. Its one singular belief, where as religion is a system of many beliefs, some having nothing to do with God at all, you must adopt to be included. Being an atheist doesn't affect my diet, my language, my desired skills, my views on sexuality, my marriage, my art, my clothing, etc. Forcing your kid to participate in religion and believe in your God also forces them to do a lot of other shit.

There is no atheist culture because atheists are all very different.

@ Kurtni
Not believing in God does affect it because you specifically don't take part in religious ceremonies/ festivities etc. It does affect your diet, language, skills etc. because you don't do it in the same way as a religious person would. It seems that you see it as the way Atheists live is the base (the 'right' or 'normal' way) and that a religious life is an alteration of that base way of living. Religious people will see it the same way but with their own way of life at the centre.

Kurtni:

There is no atheist culture because atheists are all very different.

Yeah but so are Christians and Muslims and people of other religions. I suppose it was incorrect for me to put the word 'culture' in that sentence. I simply meant their beliefs.

fell_:

@ Kurtni
Not believing in God does affect it because you specifically don't take part in religious ceremonies/ festivities etc. It does affect your diet, language, skills etc. because you don't do it in the same way as a religious person would. It seems that you see it as the way Atheists live is the base (the 'right' or 'normal' way) and that a religious life is an alteration of that base way of living. Religious people will see it the same way but with their own way of life at the centre.

Yeah but so are Christians and Muslims and people of other religions. I suppose it was incorrect for me to put the word 'culture' in that sentence. I simply meant their beliefs.

The difference being is that religion is a causation, where as atheism is not. My diet is not caused by atheism, my marriage was not caused by atheism, where as some Hindus consider their veganism to be directly caused by their religion. Where as atheism is a passive trait, religion is an active trait with active effects or consequences. I

The fact that individual religions are different doesn't matter. A kid being raised as a Baptist isn't affected by Muslim culture, but they are affected by Baptist culture and fundamentalism for example. Its not as simple as believing in God or not, but adopting an entire style of life based on the unsubstantiated beliefs of your parents.

fell_:

It seems that you see it as the way Atheists live is the base (the 'right' or 'normal' way) and that a religious life is an alteration of that base way of living.

I said, quote "Atheists are all very different," how could I be implying they're the "norm" when my entire post was about the lack of unity between atheists? That doesn't make sense.