we made it this far.

Hana knew nothing good could come of this, her eyes boring into the little stick in her hands. They had acted like it was perfectly normal to sleep with your best friend, woke up and pretended like it was just a normal sleepover between them, but instead of watching movies and playing video games they were doing something else. Not only was it a bad idea to sleep with your best friend, it was a very bad idea to sleep with someone you loved and knew they could never love you back. Hana couldn't stop him from achieving his dream of being an Olympic swimmer, he had scouts lining up and ready to take him. A baby would most definitely stop that. She couldn't tell him, Rin could never find out. It had been days since she'd gone over to Samezuka to see him, and now she was screwed. Hana threw the stick away in the trashcan when she heard a knock on her front door, knowing it was Gou coming to walk with her to school. Ignoring the churning in her stomach, she grabbed her bag and slipped her shoes on, heading out the door. "Hey! Sorry, I woke up late." She apologized, walking in the direction of Iwatobi.

--

It had been a couple days since Haruka had been to school, his friends have all stopped by to see him and wish them well, but it was hard. Emi had no memory of her life before, only memories of what they had shared with her. He had sat there and watched while she went through scrapbooks her mother had saved up from her childhood, but she recalled nothing. Friends of Emi's had stopped by and even the swim team, but still nothing--she didn't even remember him, either. The memories they shared together were long gone, with Haru still trying to hold on. He told her they were together before, but he acted like her friend as to not confuse her, to not put any pressure on her to remember things. Haruka stood in her kitchen, preparing some mackerel hoping it would jog her memory as he did everyday. Haruka was honestly starting to get tired of his favorite dish, but he still held onto hope she would rememer.

As Rin made his way to classes, he checked his phone again. He'd sent several texts to Hana lately, but she hadn't really responded to any. Part of him felt fairly anxious, but he also wondered if she just wanted some space. Considering that they had recently slept together, it wouldn't be surprising, he figured. At the same time, he was beginning to wonder if she regretted it. He didn't, but if she did, he probably would because that meant it would put a rift in their friendship. As much as he had enjoyed what they had done, he didn't want to lose Hana, ever. Was it a mistake to her? Should it be a mistake to him? She was important to him, probably more than he could fully comprehend, and he worried that things might blow up in his face. After he walked into his class, he decided to take a different approach. He texted Gou instead, something he usually didn't do, and hoped that Gou could tell him whether Hana was okay or not, or whether she was upset with him. Gou, of course, didn't need to know the details.

---

It was frightening not knowing anything about herself or anybody around her, but Emi was trying her best to remember. Her eyes scanned over the scrapbook her mother - or, at least, who everybody said was her mother - had brought her, in hopes that it might stir memories if she looked hard or long or often enough. It seemed like a lost hope, though, because none of the pictures were bringing back any memories. Was her name even Emi? What if these pictures were all fake? How was she supposed to know if anything she had been told was true or not? It left her feeling both panicked at times and frustrated. How long would it be before her memories returned, even just one or a few or even just moments where she felt things were familiar? It wasn't fair. Sighing, she set the scrapbook down and climbed off her bed to head downstairs, mostly curious as to what the boy, Haruka, was making. She figured it was mackerel; it tended to be what he cooked, from what she noticed.

Hana watched as Gou pulled out her phone, eyebrows furrowing together as she typed out a reply. "My brother just texted me, something he hardly does. I have to literally beg him to call me," she rolled her eyes. "But he's wondering if you're okay, which leads me to believe something is wrong between you two. So, spill." She demanded, placing her hands on her hips and staring at Hana, giving her that look that meant tell me what's wrong or else. "What did my idiot brother do?" Hana swallowed thickly, her stomach churning as she lightly rubbed it. "It, uh.. wasn't just your brother." She mumbled quietly, trying to ignore the hardened gaze that was focused on her every move. Hana had just found out this morning for sure, even though she had some kind of inkling something wasn't right. But in a few months, that would become the harsh reality--everyone would know what happened, her belly would get bigger. "You're my best friend and his brother, but please--please, don't tell him." She cleared her throat, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "I'm, uh.. p-pregnant, and it's.. his." She whispered, squeezing her eyes shut together. Gou was silent for a moment before she wrapped an arm around her friend, walking down the sidewalk to school, not saying a single word the whole way, just letting Hana cry into her shoulder.

--

Haruka sent a group text to his friends to let them know where he was, once again. It wasn't that Haruka minded, but he did miss swimming. Emi wasn't ready to go back to school yet, though, she won't be cleared until at least next week and Haruka wasn't going without her. Her mother could only take off so much work before she had to go back, so he offered to help around and watch her while she was gone, it was the least he could do. Haruka finished the dish, placing it on two different plates--one for her and him, in case she was hungry. He heard the floorboard creak behind him, turning around and nodded at her in greeting, setting the plates down at the table. "Uh, made some food if you're hungry." Was all he said, sitting down in a chair and beginning to eat quietly as he watched her for a second, before turning to his plate.

Rin's eyes widened slightly when he realized that Gou had texted him back. At least they weren't both ignoring his messages. Seeing that her reply hadn't really answered his question, though, he sent out another text. And another. And another. Because, really, why shouldn't he spam his sister when he was worried about his friend and it was obvious that Gou was around Hana? Maybe, if he spammed Gou enough, she might make Hana reply to him. Or, maybe it might just annoy them both. If that ended up being the case, he could probably deal with it later. Maybe he could leave school early and go to Iwatobi to meet Hana and Gou after school ended, make sure that she was alright himself, in person. Would that mean more to her? Or would it annoy her even more, if she was already annoyed? And what if she really did only want her space and he was just over-reacting because he was too worried for his own good? Maybe he should just stop thinking so much.

---

Emi stared at Haruka for a few moments, though her gaze dropped to the food for a few moments. Yeah, mackerel, she thought, realizing that she had assumed properly. Nodding slightly, she made her way over and moved to sit down. "Um, thank you," she murmured quietly, her eyes focused on the food for a moment longer before she looked up at him. "Do you really eat mackerel this often? It can't really be healthy to only eat this, can it?" Because, wasn't that a lot of mackerel to put into one's body in such a short amount of time? Maybe once a week, she could understand, but she was pretty sure that he had made mackerel every day that he had been there since she had come to her home from the hospital. Maybe it was something that she had liked when she had her memories? Was it a favorite food of hers or something and that was why he made it? It was still frustrating to not know or remember anything, especially when it affected others.

@ momentai.

Hana could hear her friend's phone going off constantly in her pocket, swallowing thickly. Rin must be really worried about her.. but how was she supposed to face him when what was in her belly could ruin his career? She knew Rin, he would want to be there for her and whatever was going on inside her, totally pushing the fact that he wanted to be in the Olympics to the side in order to do so. Hana couldn't let him do that, he had been working way too hard for this to just give it up over something so silly. Besides, Hana had Gou right? And all of her other friends? Surely she could handle this on her own, and if that meant pushing Rin away so he could achieve his dreams then so be it. She just wanted him to be happy, and achieving his goal would definitely do that. "Please, Gou, don't say anything to your brother. I know you want to, but.. I can't do that to him," she whispered, rubbing at her red and teary eyes as they walked up to the Iwatobi building. Gou didn't say anything, just nodded her head silently--as she didn't know what to do, either. This was a fine mess, she thought to herself.

--

Haruka just kind of nodded. "I prepare it in different ways--you'd be surprised how many ways there is to cook mackerel," he huffed. Emi always gave him some kind of grief over eating his favorite dish a lot, so he was kind of happy that she still was--even if she couldn't remember it before. But it was something, and he definitely held onto those little moments where he realized that even with her memories missing, she was still the same girl he had fell in love with. And she was never mean about it, always teasing him that one day he was just going to be swimming and turn into a mackerel--it was kind of cute, the way she said it. Haru swallowed thickly, the memories flooding him of the time they spent together before all of this happened. He couldn't imagine how it must feel being on her end of things, being surrounded by so many people and not remembering any of them, he didn't know how she was coping. But on his end of things, it was tough watching her go through life like this, and he hoped she would get better soon.

There wasn't any response to his montage of messages and Rin wasn't sure what to think about it all. Had he done something wrong? Groaning, he leaned back in his seat, though he really just wanted to get up and leave. He was sure there was no point in that, though, when he knew that Hana and Gou were probably in school themselves. Or at least heading that way, anyways. Waiting until after school was going to be agonizing, though. What time was Iwatobi's lunch, again? Maybe he could go there during it, whether he had class or not. Since Gou wasn't replying to his messages, though, he resorted to asking the others. Things were a little better between them, so it wasn't too weird that he was asking those guys what time their lunch was, right? Well, if it was, he could certainly pretend that it wasn't.

---

"Ah, then this isn't a favorite of mine? That's a little relieving, I don't want to turn into a mackerel or something," Emi managed to joke lightly, though it was hard. At the same time, though, the words seemed almost familiar, as if she had said something similar in the past. She just couldn't think of any time that she may have said it or something like it and her memories weren't really cooperating. It was almost like it was on the tip of her tongue, but it refused to let itself be known. It was troubling and she felt lost. Sighing, she tried to force away her concerns and focused on eating quietly. "I suppose being a mackerel wouldn't be the worst thing, though. As long as you're smart enough to avoid getting hooked by a fisher."