Even If You Can't Hear My Voice, I'll Be Right Beside You

It was difficult being there but Bucky was glad that Ari had brought him there, he felt like he needed this. Needed to see who he had been before he was turned into this monster, see the people who he somewhat remembered from that time. Put names to blurry faces in his memories, see the clothes he had once worn and read about the missions he had done and the people he had saved. It hurt, it hurt him deep down in his heart because he now knew for certain that he had once been a good guy. But that part of him had been stolen and he wasn’t sure if he could ever regain that part of him, he hoped one day he would be able to.

“I worry about you,” His voice was a whisper, he was terrified that one day something would set him off and he’d hurt the one person who has been there for him. But he didn’t feel like he could talk about that now, talk about how much danger Ari was in for constantly being around him. Danger from HYDRA but also from himself, he couldn’t remember everything he has done so he had no idea about things that could set him off. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he hurt her, he cared too much about her. But at the same time, he couldn’t leave her.

Listening to her words, she was right. This moment was about him and only him, he couldn’t think about HYDRA or let them ruin the good memories he had about this part of his life. Nodding his head lightly he sat out on the balcony for a little while longer, before he was ready to head back inside the museum. He moved onto the next article, an article that was all about him. James Barnes. Feeling Ari’s fingers brush his, he took her small hand into his and wrapped his fingers with her own. It was a small gesture and one that he needed at that very moment, he exhaled slowly as his eyes moved over the words in the article. It was about his life, growing up with his family and how he first became a soldier, how he had been friends with Steve since they were kids and all the good that he had done. He was stunned by what he was reading, some of his hazy memories matched what was written about him. But he took in all the information that he could, this was the sole reason for attending the museum so he could find out more about himself.

---

Following Steve’s movements Grace rested a hand on his shoulder while her other hand held onto his, his hand rested on her back as they started to sway in time to the music that was playing. She wasn’t all that great once they started and did miss a few steps here and there, but Steve was leading her and it didn’t seem to matter if she did make any mistakes. After a few minutes she felt more comfortable there, her body eased into his and her feet moved more easily. A smile adorned her lips as she was enjoying herself, she couldn’t even feel the eyes of couples that were watching them if any still were.

Looking up at him, she shook her head softly. “It isn’t that strange,” She told him in hopes he wouldn’t feel embarrassed for commenting on how she smelt, “You also smell really good. A new cologne?” She asked as she hadn’t smelt this one before, not that she went around smelling him every time that she saw him. But whatever he was wearing smelt amazing, like he had gone running through a field of trees on a foggy morning. Their bodies continued to move in time with the jazz music, before the song ended but the band was quick to start playing another song for the couples who were dancing.

But this time the song was slower in pace, a more romantic song for all the couples to enjoy. Grace didn’t make any move to exit the dance floor, she was already there so she might as well enjoy a slow dance with Steve. She moved her hand from his shoulder to the back of his neck, her fingers gently playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. Their feet didn’t need to move that much now, it was more that their bodies moved and swayed to the music. She closed the gap between them and rested her forehead against his, “I hope you aren’t nervous anymore.” She whispered to him as his shoulders didn’t feel tense.

The words were sweet of him to say, and perhaps in any other moment Ari would have blushed and felt all warm as fuzzy, but right now was not that moment, solely for the reason that this was a serious moment for Bucky, and it had to remain about him. Even as she stood beside him, her hand in his, reading whatever he was reading at this moment, she kept herself from asking questions and urging him in. Slowly, one step at a time they would get through this.

She did keep an eye on the crowd though, now and then scanning the faves, always aware there could genres watching, ears listening. But the crowd was peaceful and quiet. She turned back to the podium.

When he was done and was ready to move to the next station, one about his last mission, Ari shook his arm a little and gestured to a year written nearby, stalling for time. There was a couple there, and she would rather not approach. "Hey look," she said with a small amused grin, "That's the year my great grandfather died. In the war. Fought for the Italians with the Nazis. Don't get me wrong, I'm told he hated violence but he got enlisted." She forced a small laugh. The couple was gone and Ari too the chance to lead Bucky over, leaving him to read again.

---

She was doing well, qute well, for someone who hasn't danced in a while - or at least claimed to have not. Sure she made some little missteps but it was all forgiven and he did not expect anything from her. He wasnt here to judge her dancing ability. He was here to enjoy the movement.

Stee grinned as she complimented his smell, and looked down at her cheeky. "Guess who suggested it." He lightly teased the tip of her nose with his own. It might take her a moment, but it certainly wasn't Natasha. And not Agent Carter. Not Sam, and not Tony. It was the same one as who helped pick his suit, Clint. Steve was very thankful for it. Clint knew what was new and what was in fashion, and thanks to his wife was kept up to date with the latest perfumes. So when they stood in front of the cologne store and Steve was blown away by all the smells, Clint helped narrow it down. "I hoped you would like it," he admitted to her and added, "I should wear it more often, Hmm?"

With the slow music, he only changed his pacing and as Grace came closer he set his arm around her waist fully and rested his chin just above her shoulde, lips by her ear. "No," he said softly, "I'm not nervous at all." It was a pleasant feeling. The smile on his lips was clear as day in his tone. This was a lovely evening and e didn't want it to end.

Bucky took a few minutes to read the words that had been written, he slowly moved his eyes over the words like that would help him take in all this new but old information. Ari didn't seem to mind, however no matter how caught up he was in learning about the man he used to be. He still did notice how her attention would move off around the room, she was scanning the faces in case they had been followed there or found out.

Although he assumed if that was the case and HYDRA was there, they would have made a move already. They didn't care about the innocent people standing around him, they would see him as their mission and nothing would stop them from kidnapping him or just killing him. He had been like that once, he had gone through innocent lives in order for him to finish a mission and that thought made him sick to his stomach. So he pushed that thought from his mind and went to move onto the next article, however he could because Ari drew his attention over to another article that they hadn't gone to yet.

"I'm sure he was a good man, although seeing how you turned out does have me thinking otherwise." He was joking and hopefully it sounded like that, even if his voice stayed the same. Rather cold. But he did force a smile on his lips to show her that he was joking, he couldn't imagine anyone in her family being a horrible person. He wasn't counting Luka of course, but he also remembered how wonderful her parents had been to him. Once she allowed him back to the next article, he inhaled sharply as he begun to read what it was about. It was his last mission with Captain America, the mission that he would 'die' in and he wished that he had been left there in the snow to die.

---

Grace looked at him smiling, "Well it wouldn't have been Tony. His taste in cologne isn't anything like this and I don't even know if Bruce wears cologne, Thor isn't around right now and Sam would have only given you a hard time so that only leaves Clint. And I know how much he listens to his wife," It was easy to work out, Clint was the only married man among the Avengers and knew what women wanted. Well his wife knew what women wanted and liked, she looked into his eyes as their bodies moved together perfectly. "You should wear it more often, I really like it on you." She admitted to him a little shyly, he could honestly wear any cologne and he would smell amazing.

As the music slowed and Steve moved closer to her, his breath was warm on her ear as he spoke to her. He wasn't nervous anymore, which was good because he didn't have a reason to be nervous on their date. "I'm glad that you aren't, you better get used to this because I plan on having any more dates with you." Her eyes moved away from his, she wasn't embarrassed but she did feel shy saying that to him. They weren't official and this was only their first date, she felt like she was jumping ahead too quickly for him.

She didn't even know how much experience he had with women, she only knew that it wasn't all that much considering all the time he spent frozen in ice. Leaning closer into his body, she turned her head and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Ari poked his arm with a soft laugh, keeping it down, “That’s so mean. Naughty,” She teased him, but clearly wasn’t affected by his words, understanding it was a joke and being one to take humour easily. Many people had once questioned her about her father, asked if she supported the Nazi movement, at first she scowled at them, then she ignored, and eventually sarcastically would say yes and scare them. That was in high school, and by the end of it she was simply tired of it, so she just ended up rolling her eyes whenever the question came up.

She walked over with him to the next article and read it through too, pausing a moment to linger on the face of joy on Steve as he stood by a younger carefree looking Bucky. She turned her gaze from the stand to Bucky, watching his face for any emotion before gesturing to Steve. “You have to try. I don’t think he’s the sort of person to hold a grudge against someone who had no choice. I’m sure he’ll understand.” She lightly squeezed his hand. “Maybe he can help? I’m sure he…” She trailed off. Sure, he most likely knew people and that would be convenient, but how willing was Bucky to go under machines again. Ari frowned lightly and protectively shuffled closer, as if to protect him from future things. “I’m sure he’ll be accepting of you.” She amended her statement and offered another light smile.

---

Steve smiled as she guessed, doing his best not to give anything away, but her reasoning was on point and she seemed to know the people at the base really well. “I’m surprised you didn’t mention Natasha,” he admitted with a laugh. “I did consider going to her, but I was afraid she would not leave me alone.” He gently brushed a bit of hair back from her face and gave her forehead a small kiss. “Thank you. I shall try to remember.” There was no try. It was a will and do. Steve, sure, was old but his memory was perfect.

“More dates with the doctor,” He hummed happily, setting his head against hers as they gently swayed. His eyes closed a little, enjoying the music and the moment. Nothing was alarming, nothing was troubling him. There were no fears of something about to explode, or someone to shoot. No. He had a perfectly happy moment and his guard was down more than ever. And it felt nice.

All too soon the song ended, and the jazz band were starting a small break while radio music played. Steve parted from Grace after a small kiss on her lips and lead her back to the table. “Dessert?” he offered, “Or shall we take our leave for the corner shop ice-cream?” He saw it had more flamboyant flavours, and he was eager to try them out. He could eat vanilla and pudding any day but just like from the stall back in the park by the lake a few days ago, he wished to try something new again.

Bucky read over the words that were displayed out in front of him, a decent amount sounded and felt foreign to him. But there were parts that he understood, not always completely but he still wasn’t confused by what he was reading about the person he once had been. He was about to go over the words a second time, before Ari’s soft voice broke through his concentration. Turning his head so he could peer down at her, he listened to what she was telling him. He did believe her, if she thought Steve would continue to support him and help him then he was certain it would happen. But he still wasn’t convinced that he wanted to drag another person into the danger that is his life right now, being on the run from HYDRA and SHIELD. He didn’t trust either as he was sure both wanted him dead, SHIELD mainly just because he was the Winter Solider and could still pose a threat to the world.

“I’m sure that you’re right, but do I want to drag him into all of this mess that I’ve caused?” He glanced over to the photo on the display, a younger version of himself was standing beside Steve and both were smiling happily. “I shouldn’t have even brought you into this, my life is far too dangerous right now.” Moving his eyes back to settle on Ari, she was innocent in all of this and it was the least she deserved. But at the same time Bucky wanted her by his side, she knew how to comfort him and she has been there for him. His grip tightened ever so slightly on her hand, so she wouldn’t let go anytime soon. He could tell that she wasn’t pleased with his answer, sighing lightly he knew he’d probably regret this. “If anything does happen, then I’ll ask for help.” He spoke as he was only making that deal with her for her own sake, if HYDRA did find him then he would only ask Steve to help in protecting Ari.

---

Grace smiled when she was clearly right about Clint being the one who helped Steve out for their date, “If you had gone to Natasha then she wouldn’t have stopped bugging you about tonight. And she would have also paid me a few visits, which she hasn’t done.” She explained to him before he gently moved some of her hair back away from her face, her eyes closing for a second while he pressed his lips to her forehead for a sweet kiss. She couldn’t remember a time when she had felt so carefree and relaxed, but being there with Steve and having their bodies close while swaying to slow music was perfect in her opinion. Work hasn’t crossed her mind, he was clearly not stressing about Bucky or saving the world, they had plenty to talk about and none of it involved work. This night couldn’t get any better.

All too soon the band took a break from playing, which is when she shared an intimate kiss with her date before stepping back over to their table. “Let’s pay the bill and go grab some more ice cream,” She smiled even though the desserts did sound delicious, she was more than happy to get an ice cream and stroll through the streets with Steve at her side. Grace caught the eye of the waitress who had served them and signaled for the bill to be brought over, once it was she didn’t even have time to look at the total cost because Steve took it upon himself to place a few notes in the small folder to cover their meals and the tip. Grace did appreciate the gesture, although he wouldn’t always be paying for their dates. Grabbing her handbag she reached over for Steve’s hand, entwining their fingers as they headed out onto the street and walked in the direction of the ice cream shop they visited before. “I’m paying for the desserts,” She told him as she pressed a kiss to his cheek, her stomach was rather full from dinner but she always had room for dessert.

Ari gave a small pout of her lips. “Look, I understand you may think your life is dangerous, and yes, it is. But,” She put a finger up to silence him if he had anything to say, and after a quick scan of the crowd to make sure people weren’t listening, added in a low voice, “You don’t have to be who you were before. If you do everything you can to improve, to change, then things will get better and people see you are trying, they’ll be more willing to accept you. This-“ she gestured to the tablets, “-is all nice, and it shows you who you were. Try to become that person again, or a new one. I know you can’t erase the past, but it does nobody any good if you let it consume you.” She gave his hand a reaffirming squeeze. “Okay?”

His own little promise had to settle her though, she knew there was only so much she could say, and she decided to compromise and agree to it. “Alright. Just make sure you keep your word.” She grinned, looked around. It was the end of the row, and there was nothing more interesting to see. “Shall we head outside? There’s a park nearby?”

---

Steve thought it sounded a good idea, and agreed wholeheartedly. The waitress was called over, the bill was paid – quickly before Grace could even utter a word, and they were headed out of the restaurant to the nearby walkway to collect some ice-creams. As they stepped outside, Steve offered her his arm, more of a romantic gesture than a simple ‘lets hold hands’.

“Oh no,” he laughed, shaking his head, “I’m paying the desserts too. No ifs. No buts. I don’t get to do this often. I’m going to be persistent.” He looked down at her with a fond smile as she gave him a kiss on the cheek. "And you don't want me to put on my persistent voice, right?" He teased, nuzzling the side of her face with his nose. Steve hoped she would let him do so. It was, after all, perhaps one of the few if not the only time a girl had gone out on a full date with him and stayed to its end. He would pay his heart out. It felt nice. The little walk was short and lovely, and he had his jacket ready should Grace start feeling cold. They hadn’t walked far when Steve stopped by a little stall, and eyed the hot sweets on sale. “You know,” he said as he reached for his wallet, “I’m going to change to this. A hot chocolate, with flakes, and cream. And ice-cream.” He looked at Grace as if he had discovered the tastiest thing in the world and it had been presented to him out of nowhere. For it had. “Do you want anything from here?” He paid for his treat, and waited for her answer. If not, there was the ice-cream stall not far from here, and he didn’t mind which she chose.

Bucky did hear what Ari was saying, but sadly it wasn't all that easy. He did know that he didn't have to be the Winter Solider anymore, he didn't want to be that person. It would just take time for him to change into a man that he wanted, he should have been thinking in a more positive light but that was also hard. "I'll keep my word, you can count on that." He assured her as he noticed they had finished seeing new displays, which was good because he wasn't sure if his brain could take anything else in right now. "A walk would be nice," He agreed as he turned around to find the exit, his hand still holding onto Ari's as they moved towards the closest exit.

Once outside Bucky felt better, the air surrounding him and there weren't as many people near him now. Allowing Ari to lead the way to the park, he would like to take a walk with her and just relax. He had learnt new things about himself but it was all a bit too much, he didn't want to think about the person he had been a long time ago. So he'd simply focus on Ari and the time they spent together, the park was in sight but Bucky's attention was captured by a small hot dog and pretzel stand. "Are you hungry?" He asked as he was beginning to feel his stomach asking for some food, the smell of food coming from the stand also wasn't helping the situation.

---

Grace linked her arm around Steve's as they walked, when Steve told her that he would be paying for their desserts. She had opened her mouth to refuse, but he certainly was being persistent about not letting her pay for anything. Normally she would have stood her ground but Steve was right, he didn't get to do this often so she would only allow it this once. "You aren't being persistent, you're being annoying." She teased feeling his nose nuzzle the side of her face, but let the subject drop as it was obvious he wasn't going to let her pay. They walked not much further when Steve stopped them beside a stall, Grace looked the stall over before smiling when Steve spotted the hot chocolate on the menu. It was adorable how excited and happy he got when he discovered something new, that he never had back in his day.

"I might actually..." She knew having an ice cream would just make her cold, so she ordered a milk and white hot chocolate with cream and ice cream. The white and milk chocolate melted together and made heaven, she also ordered a warm brownie slice as she couldn't pass it by. Steve paid for their order and they stood off to the side to wait, she moved closer into Steve's warm body and pressed a sweet little kiss to his lips. "I never want this night to end," She whispered to him as they were close enough so he'd still hear her, their date really has been perfect. It did make her wonder just how much help Clint had given, because from someone who hasn't been on many dates Steve sure knew how to plan one out. After a few minutes they were handed their drinks and Grace took her brownie, the hot cup instantly warmed her up and she couldn't wait to taste the sugary goodness. "Can we sit down?" She asked just so she could eat her brownie without dropping any, watching as Steve nodded his head they stepped over to a bench and sat down. Grace set her drink beside her before breaking off a piece of brownie and offering it to Steve, "It's really good." She looked at him to see if he wanted to try the piece.

Ari welcomed the change in air from air conditioned to fresh, and took a deep breath as they walked out, filling her lungs with much needed new air and clearing her mind. She looked over at the hot food stand in question, and smiled with a shake of her head but heading to it anyway, reaching for her wallet. "No," she replied, "But we can buy you something." She slowed as they neared it and browsed through the variety of foods available. All looked so delicious and tempting, it was a shame she had to diet. Her money ready, she let Bucky choose his pick.

---

He returned the kiss with joy, smiling lightly against her lips. "But then we couldn't spend another day together," he replied with a small chuckle. The night was beautiful sure, but Steve liked the day too. it reminded him less of night missions, and it was brighter, easier to see and more things to do! Like go for a run, or go for a long walk in the natural parks. Hopefully, one day he could bring Grace along. She had kept up significantly well with him - okay, kept up with Sam - back in their morning runs at the secret base, so he didn't think it'd be impossible. A challenge, maybe, but doable. In any case, he would offer to carry her without a second thought.

Given their order, they took their seat, and for a moment Steve looked at the brownie, wrinkling his forehead in that cute manner of his. He didn't want to rob her of the sweet taste, but the offer was tempting, so he reached over and took the small piece. "Thank you." It was delicious, as she said, melting all over on his tongue. The hot drink to go with it was even more so wonderful. "Imagine what they could have in the future, if this is what it is now," he mused, gesturing to the food, lightly rolling his eyes in wonder. The sweet hot dessert was near-gone all too quickly for his liking, and seeing that he was way ahead of Grace in eating his own, he slowed down, leaning back on the bench and watching the sky above.

"This is nice," He said, reaching over and lightly putting his arm by her shoulder, gently playing with her hair, "Thank you. Again."

Bucky didn't want to buy any food if Ari wasn't going to have any, but then his stomach grumbled and he knew he couldn't walk past the little stall without buying something hot to eat. "Thank you," His voice was soft as he stepped over to the stall, he already knew what he wanted. He ordered himself a hot dog with all the trimmings, there was a picture of the hot dog on the stall and it looked delicious. Watching as Ari handed over some money, he stepped aside and waited for his meal to be put together for him. "Are you sure you don't want something?" He asked her as they waited together, it wasn't a long wait and within a few minutes the man was handing the hot dog over to Bucky who took it eagerly.

---

"That's true," Grace mused as Steve was right, if this night never ended then they couldn't go on anymore dates as this would last forever. "Maybe for our next date we could do something during the day, when we both have the day off work." Smiling she looked at him, she felt like they could do so much in a day date. They could go on a hike, have a picnic, or just explore the city that has changed from what Steve remembered. Anything with him would be extra nice and fun.

She couldn't imagine what everything would be like in the future, when she was old and grey. But the world was constantly changing and she wouldn't be surprised if brownies and hot chocolate were completely different in the future, "I can't even think of what will change in the future. Everything is amazing already, I hope the changes are for the better." She stated honestly as it would be hard to ruin a good brownie, but it wasn't impossible. Grace finished off her brownie but sipped her hot chocolate while she enjoyed the night, there was a cold breeze but nothing that would make her cold. Besides having Steve close to her was keeping her warm and toasty.

"You don't need to thank me, I should be thanking you for such a wonderful night." She leaned into his side as he played with her hair, her cup was beginning to feel lighter as the hot liquid was coming to an end. "Is there anything else you'd like to do tonight?" She asked as she wasn't entirely sure what was still open, but the night was getting late and there would be a time when they needed to say goodnight and each head home.

“Oh, I’m fine,” she laughed lightly, paid and they headed off to sit somewhere. But the only space not on grass (Ari didn’t wish to dirty her jeans and the grass was slightly wet and warm from recent mowing), the only bench available was one by a children’s playground. She cast a glance at Bucky’s arm to make sure it was covered before gesturing to it. “Do you think you can…?” She trailed off, biting her lip as she looked up at him. Quickly then, added, “I mean, it’s there or we can go another place. It’s not like I enjoy kid-watching.” She looked away with a small playful roll of her eyes. “Kids can be annoying, right? Loud little versions of their parents.”

---

Steve smiled as she leaned in, and rested his head against hers for a while, but even all good things come to an end and he too was feeling the lull for sleep. “Ah, no. I’m quite content with everything. And quite spent.” He laughed lightly, “The age is catching up!” Slowly, he started to stand, offering his hand to her to take the rubbish in one and her hand in the other, and to walk to the rubbish bin to throw their litter out. “Are you busy tomorrow?” He asked, putting his free hand into a pocket. “I got nothing on. Maybe we can take a walk in one of the parks? During the day? I heard the weather would be nice.”

And that it would be nice to spend more time with her. But he didn’t mention it. It was a small private things he kept to himself. There was a limit to everything, and there would only be so much affection that even Steve could take. Everything in good measure! Savor it, but never overeat so to say. “Shall we head back?”

[Goodness, so sorry I kept this short. Trying to arrange the two timelines together is difficult. ]

Bucky held his hotdog in his hand and would have been fine walking and eating, but maybe sitting down for a little bit was the better option. He didn’t want any sauce to spill onto his shirt or to drop the melting cheese, he didn’t want to come across as messy or like a slob in front of Ari. So when she mentioned that they could sit down, he nodded his head in agreement. Plus it would be easier for him to eat if he was seated, “No that bench is fine.” He told her and noticed her eye roll, he knew she was covering up the fact that children may be growing on her.

He didn’t say a thing however, instead he walked over to the bench with her and sat down. A couple of families were still out, the children laughing as they played and ran around without a care in the world. Bucky couldn’t even remember a time when he had been that innocent and care free, although when he was young it had been a much different place. It was common for men to go off in the army and become a soldier, it was common nature to follow your father’s footsteps. The hot dog wasn’t getting shorter with every bite that he took, the deliciousness was sticking on his tongue.

“I don’t find kids to be annoying,” He told her with a grin on his face as he glanced over to her, “You can admit to me that kids don’t annoy you. I won’t tell your parents,” He chuckled softly as he used his napkin to wipe his mouth.

---

“Your age isn’t catching up with you,” Grace told him as she also stood up and handed her rubbish over to him, so he could toss it all into the trash can that was nearby. Her fingers entwined with his as she was feeling herself becoming tired, “I’m not doing anything tomorrow. A walk in a park sounds lovely, I’ll make some sandwiches and we could have lunch in the park.” She suggested as they could have a cute little picnic in a park and make a day out of it, there were still plenty of things to do in the city during the day.

“Let’s head back, I’m getting a little tired myself.” She didn’t want this time to end, but it was and she was alright with that. She’d be seeing him again tomorrow, she was lucky that way. They worked in the same company and it was easy to make plans to see each other, not all relationships are like that. It got that way in the end of her relationship with Luka, they were both always working and it did get hard for them to see each other or plan a date.

But things were easy with Steve. So they walked hand in hand back in the direction they came, so they could find the car that he borrowed and head home. The walk wasn’t a long one and within ten minutes they were back at the car, Grace thanked him as he held the car door open for her as she climbed in. Once they had buckled up, Steve drove through the streets back towards her apartment.

Ari followed him along and they sat down on the bench, and she passively glanced at the children before focusing on a nearby bird. Pointedly, she huffed, giving a small pout as he chuckled. Not that she was actually upset. "I don't understand why anyone would want a child. Years of changing diapers and putting up with nonsense squeals and petty sibling fights." She shook her head, closing her eyes for the briefest of moments as she took a breath of the fresh air, before fixing a teasing look on Bucky. "I suppose you are a family man, and want children?"

Clasping her hands together, she looked at the playground and made a small face. "Nobody believes me. Kids are such a responsibility that I don't even want to think about having. No thanks. Not my piece of cake." For the most part, this was true for her. She had no interest in children, especially not at this age, especially not now. She barely had a place to live and barely enough money to sustain her own self, let alone some pooping-crying human thing to fill her time up with.

---

"A picnic!" Steve looked delightfully and genuinely happy. How long had it been since he last went on a picnic? Many decades? "Yes, sounds lovely." With her hand in his, they walked back to the car, arranging a time to meet up. He offered to pick her up from the apartment, or alternatively if she wished, they could simply meet at the park - though he expressed his worry her carrying the picnic things all alone would be quite inconvenient. Not that he thought it heavy and her weak - no, just that it was a lot and would require many trips, or be uncomfortable.

The car was a nice place to discuss things to eat a the said picnic, and Steve volunteered to bring a few foods and drinks (waters and juices) to it, just so she wouldn't have to bring everything. Outside her apartment, they pulled up and stopped, and Steve walked with her to her door. Just outside it though, he hesitated a little, took her hands into his and leaned in, giving her a small kiss on the lips. "Thank you for the night," he said softly, a soft smile on his lips and a cheeky twinkle in his eye. It had been wonderful, it had been lovely. He hadn't thought a single thing about anything else and for once it was nice to relax. He didn't even think about this now, his heart was leaping with joy.

"I shall see you tomorrow then," he said, and wished her a goodnight, but stuck around a little, to make sure she would get into her apartment well and truly fine, and that everything was well and fine within.

Bucky didn’t understand why anyone wouldn’t want a family of their own, he did remember wanting one after the war finished and after he married a woman. It is what was expected of people back when he was younger, apparently that part of society has changed over the years. “I always planned to start a family after I found a wife,” He told Ari after he took another large mouthful of his delicious hot dog, “A child brings so much love into your life. They’re a little being that you made and can teach everything to,” He expressed his feelings on the topic, however now he wouldn’t experience any of it. He wouldn’t be able to lead a normal life after what he has done, no one would even want to be that close to him once they realised who he truly was.

“I think that’s understandable, not to me but I have seen couples who haven’t taken that natural step.” He shrugged his shoulders lightly as he finished his hot dog off and used the napkin to wipe any sauce from around his mouth, “The world has changed.” He commented as he watched the young innocent children play, running around laughing as they didn’t understand how scary the world was now. Parents watching closely because they had to in this day and age, “I faintly remember leaving home in the morning with my siblings… or friends, we’d play and explore all day long. Only returning home for lunch and dinner, it’s not that free for children now.” He wasn’t sure what Ari’s childhood was like, but he hoped she had the chance to be a child and not be worried about people wanting to hurt her.

---

Grace had spent the morning making sandwiches and a fruit salad, she even cut up cheese and found a box of crackers in her pantry. She pulled out the picnic basket that was a gift from her mom, packing all the food into it before she got herself ready. She pulled her hair up into a messy bun and didn’t wear much makeup, just mascara and a tinted lip balm. It was a nice day so a basic t-shirt and a pair of shorts with sandals was enough for her, it was a causal date anyway. Steve was a few minutes early and looked handsome like always, the drive wasn’t long to the park but they did have to search for a car park before finding one. “It’s such a nice day, perfect weather to be outside.” She smiled as they walked into the park, Steve took the picnic basket and drinks before she could so she carried the blanket.

“What about over there? Under the tree,” Grace pointed across the park to a large old tree, they could sit in the shade so neither of them would get sunburn. Once Steve agreed they headed over before anyone else could take their spot, Grace rolled out the blanket on the green grass before sitting down. “I hope I brought enough food,” She wasn’t sure how hungry Steve got, if the serum made him burn off his food quicker and he had to eat more or if he ate the normal amount for a guy. But she did pack a fair bit of food, as they could each take left overs if any wasn’t eaten.

Ari wrinkled her nose. A little being that one made? What was it, a sex trophy? She didn’t say that out loud though, saving face and avoiding an awkward moment. Noticing the way he watched the kids, she tilted her head and raised a brow with curiosity. Was that longing in his eyes? She pressed her lips together and looked at the kids too, but found none of what he was talking about.

“Oh yeah, can’t have them staying out till late. Unless they live on a farm. City’s not so safe.” Even back in her time it was a little freer, but perhaps even safer in Bucky’s. Seeing that he had finished his hot dog, she uncrossed her legs and gestured to a path. “Shall we walk, or do you want to sit for a bit more? There’s a bus in a few minutes, we can make it on time if we start now.” She tugged at her jacket and pulled it off, but not without a glance at the sleeves covering Bucky’s arms. “Ah man, you must be hot. We can take the shadier path.” It wasn’t like he could roll up the sleeves. That would be alarming. For everyone.

---

Steve watched a bird jump about the pathway, picking up crumbs from breads that a few kids had dropped from their pastries. “Indeed,” He agreed. They could barely find a car park. It seemed everyone wanted to get out and about today. And he couldn’t blame them. He felt sorry for whoever was stuck in the office today. It was sunny but not overly hot, and the little breeze now and then was enough for a cool refreshment but not enough to annoy or scatter papers. Just right.

“Looks good,” he headed to and set the basket down so he could help Grace set the blanket down straight and pushed off his shoes, sitting down humbly on one side with enough space for Grace and the basket to fit between them.

Peeking into the basket upon her voiced concern, Steve chuckled, “Grace, this could feed a family of four. I think you’ve brought quite enough, don’t worry.” He grinned and pulled out some of the food but quickly hid it as a golden retriever ran up (and away from the beckoning calls of its owners) and launched itself happily in for cuddles from both Grace and Steve, trampling all over the blanket. Steve received a good lick in the face, and then a face full of tail fur. He couldn’t be serious now, at all. His hands found the dog’s sides and gave it a ruffle and some pats, and the retriever was overjoyed, turning from Steve to Grace in pure paradise of pats and attention.

Bucky wondered silently if anything would eventually change Ari’s mind about having children, starting a family with the right man. Maybe she needed to find that one man who was meant to be with her, that could possibly change her mind or it might not. It wasn’t a big deal, not in this day and age at least. But Bucky knew she would be a great mother, although she would learn so much from having a child. Considering her parents were busy while she was growing up. Turning to look at her, he nodded his head as it was probably time that they headed off.

“It’s alright, I’ve gotten used to staying covered.” He admitted although he was beginning to feel the heat of the sun, all he wanted to do was remove his jacket and feel the breeze on his skin. But he couldn’t, not when he was still out in public so he would just wait. Standing up from the bench he waited for Ari, “Some shade would be nice though.” He spoke as he wanted to escape from the sun, even if it was for a little while until they reached the bus stop.

---

Grace did tend to over pack, she knew that but she would still rather have too much food then not enough for them. She couldn’t help but laugh when their picnic was interrupted by a beautiful golden retriever who clearly wanted their attention, turning from Steve to her. Her hands reached out to scratch behind the ears, causing the tail to wag even more from enjoyment. However it was cut short when the owner ran over in a puff, apologizing for his new dog Monty who apparently was still learning to come on call.

“It’s fine, really.” Grace assured the middle aged man who clearly loved his sweet dog, with one last cuddle Monty retreated from where he stood in the middle of the blanket. “I wish I could have a dog,” She sighed as she watched Monty run off but this time he stayed closer to his owner, Grace had always wanted a pet but growing up her parents never had the time as they was always working. But she understood that now, she was a doctor and couldn’t keep a dog locked up in her apartment all day long.

With a determined nod, Ari took the lead to go through the shaded path of the park, keep out of the sun and enjoy the nice weather in the cool. It was lovely and fine, and she walked on in silence to preserve the nice moment. Some dog excitedly ran past, followed by some kids. The walk didn't take long till they reached a bus station nearby, and Ari stood by the pole and peered at the timetable. As she did, the bus they needed rolled up and with a satisfied and surprised say of, "Oh look! Here is ours." She pulled Bucky to the bus, showed their passes and lead them on.

As the doors closed, she saw a familiar face, and she blinked twice. Was that...? She looked away from the window, preserving her calm and turned to Barnes. Thankfully it wasn't crowded and in fact quite empty in the bus. Ark found a seat and patted the seat beside her for him to sit.

---

"Aye, a dog would be nice." Steve nodded, wistfully watching the dog run set with its wonder. Some kids chased it and he watched them run by it. "There were dogs in the military. I was often too busy to cuddle them. Though now and then I'd sneak away..• he trailed off with a laugh. His gaze landed on a brunette and a man beside her. He wondered how anyone could stand such hot weather in a jacket. He casually glanced Go his face and his heart skipped a beat.

Steve froze. He didn't know what to do. Jump up? He made a move to get up, but they couple stopped and faced away. It could simply be someone looking like him.... surely not....

The bus arrived and for a moment the man's face came into view. There was no mistake.

"Bucky," Steve whispered, watching the man get into the bus and away with the girl. Who? What? He was so shocked it didn't click to do anything but watch the bus leave.

"Did you see?" He turned sharply to Grace. "it was Bucky... Him... what's he doing here? Who was that girl?"

Bucky was glad to be hidden from the harsh sun rays by large trees that lined the pathway, it wasn’t a long walk out of the park but it was a nice one. Words weren’t spoken and it was a nice break, he didn’t feel like he had to talk or needed to say something to Ari. As they reached the bus stop, a bus pulled up only seconds later and he followed Ari onto it. He sighed in relief when cool air engulfed him, “Maybe I’ll have to find a long sleeve shirt that isn’t so heavy.” He commented as he sat down beside her, not noticing how she was acting as the bus pulled away.

He couldn’t continue to wear his jacket through the hot days, it would end up being too much for him and he didn’t want it to get to that. To where he’d have to remove his jacket and have his metal arm on show for the world to see, that was stupid and dangerous. “But that will happen once I have money,” He told Ari as she has done more than enough for him, “Is everything alright? Did we get on the wrong bus?” He asked finally noticing how on edge her body was.

---

Grace opened the picnic basket so she could pull all the food out, she smiled at the thought of Steve sneaking away from his busy schedule just so he could cuddle the dogs that the soldiers used. Her attention was only captured when he spoke again, it was the name that caused her to look up and around her but she didn’t see anyone. “Steve calm down, where is he?” She asked as she did know what Bucky looked like, but she couldn’t find his face anywhere among the people in the park. And why would he be in the park in the first place?

Steve pointed his finger outside of the park, so Grace turned around and the only thing she saw was the bus stop. Clearly Bucky wasn’t there now otherwise Steve would have surely rushed over, “He was on the bus?” She asked before she started to pack up the picnic, “We should go. We might still be able to caught up with him,” She knew how important this was to Steve, way more important than a silly little picnic that could happen on another day.

But if he had really seen Bucky and with a girl, then they needed to find them and the quicker they did the better it would be for everyone.

@ sugarplum.
Ari blankly stared out the window, trying to catch any sight of the supposed Captain America or trying to realise if she actually saw him or not. She saw a girl beside him, a familiar face. In fact, one all too familiar. Grace. What was Grace doing with Captain America in a park? What? She tried not to put any emotion on her face. She heard Bucky talking but words were distant and she barely paid attention to them, and only when he asked if everything was okay, did she react.

"Yes, all fine. I just thought I saw someone familiar." She gave him a sheepish smile and looked away. How could she go about this? Should she tell him? Would it count a lie if she did not say? It was not her place to make the final decision on whether he was ready to see Steve again or not. And last time she hid something, Barnes got all worried. She gestured to a priority seating nearby, but since many seats were empty it didn't matter to sit in this one. "look, a seat for the elderly. Sit." She sat there too and pulled him down to sit by her. The rest of the bus trip didn't takke long. They would be back home in a few.

---

Steve just stood there, and would later come to thank Grace for her quick thinking. He hated how he became so lost and clueless, full of shock everytime he saw Bucky. It would never grow old. He stood for a while and finally came back to himself.

"The girl..." he muttered, then helped Grace pack quickly and started towards the bus station trying to find its route to track it. He completely seemed oblivious to the security camera that was perched nearby, More so he was not exactly aware of cameras inside buses for security. He didn't catch many buses now, and when he did he didn't exactly go looking for hidden security cameras in them. The old habit of a simple bus remained.

Tracing his finger down the list of bus stops, he sighed at how many there were. And if she spotted him, if she were smart, she would make sure to get off some other place to lose his track if she were trying to hide Bucky. Steve turned to Grace. "How do we find them? If we could have a picture of her face, maybe we could find her details and trace Bucky from there. Do you think she's an agent of Hydra? Why are they in the open?" He paced a little, brows knitted with concern and confusion and worry. "Nothing makes sense."

Bucky wasn’t convinced that Ari was alright, but he sat down beside her as the bus moved through the streets. “Are you sure? Did you see a HYDRA agent?” He lowered his voice so only she would hear his question, not that there was anyone sitting close to where they were but he couldn’t be certain and wasn’t going to risk anything. He was risking so much already by just being outside in public, it wouldn’t take much for an agent to recognise his face. Although he thought that if Ari did see someone she knew from HYDRA, she would have told him already so maybe he was overreacting. Maybe it was a friend she had, but that wouldn’t explain why she was acting so off.

“We could get off if you wanted to see this person,” He offered her in case that was something she wanted, and to try and get more information out of her about who she thought she recognised. But he wouldn’t push her to tell him anything, he was just worried about her safety. “Maybe leaving your apartment so soon was a mistake,” He mumbled as he sat straight on the seat, his body tense as his eyes scanned the bus and everything that they passed. He would probably stay inside her apartment for the next few days, just to make sure that he wasn’t seen by HYDRA or SHIELD.

---

Grace carried the basket as she followed Steve over to the bus stop where he had seen Bucky, she was confused as well but was still able to think. “Steve stop,” She grabbed his arm when he begun to pace, she didn’t have all the answers for him on this. But she did know one thing, the city was filled with cameras pointing in every single direction. “All these buildings will have security cameras, if we can convince them to show us this bus stop then we might find out which bus Bucky took.” She explained to him as she also tried to calm him down, he wasn’t thinking straight and it was obvious it was because of his long lost friend. She was certain someone would give camera footage to Captain America, if not then they would go to someone higher up in SHIELD although she hoped it wouldn’t come to that.

Glancing over the building, Grace found a small comic book store just down the street. A security camera was pointing directly at them, “The comic books store. Let’s try there first,” The staff there would have to know who Steve was, at least that’s what Grace hoped for because it would make all of this so much easier. Although every bus had multiple stops so he could have gotten off at any one of them, it wouldn’t be easier nor would it be quick but hopefully they could know which direction Bucky had gone in and maybe who this girl was that was with him.

"No," Ari quickly shook her head, "Definitely not a HYDRA agent. I know this person. He's nice. I just wasn't expecting to see him…" She was sure she was repeating herself, but she hoped her answers would be enough to satisfy his curiosity for she could not say more without lying, and lying was the last thing she wanted to do to him. Instead, she took his hand and as she spoke his concerns and mumbled, she gave it a small squeeze. "Hey, it's okay. It wasn't a mistake. You learned a lot today. Today was good. It was productive. Helpful. Yeah?" She smiled, looking into his eyes. Oh, she just wanted to hug him here and now and tell him everything was fine. But again, she wasn't sure herself.

She saw his rigidness, and her heart hurt for it. He couldn't live a normal life when all this tension and wariness was so embedded in him. She rubbed the back of his hands a little and stayed quiet for a little longer. They arrived at their stop soon enough, and she lead them out, and while they walked, she checked her phone for any news on HYDRA or Bucky in case he was spotted, but all the resources were quiet and fine. A little message from a friend on snapchat suddenly gave her an idea. She opened it, selected the dog filter and sided up to Barnes, standing on her tippy toes to get even height with him. "Look at the camera!" She grinned, pushing the phone in front of them both to take a selfie, grinning at the dog filter on Bucky's face. "Aw, look, you look so adorable. Woof." She showed him the picture. "How cool is this? Fun, isn't it? You can open your mouth and a tongue comes out. Last week, you could be a toast. You could be a piece of bread." She looked down at the photo and saved it, but didn't send it to anyone. It was a nice photo, quite a surprise for him probably, but the look on his face was far too adorable.

---

At her word, he stopped and looked at her, waiting for an explanation. Stop? Why? He listened as she explained, and looked around. Now that she had pointed it out of course, he saw the cameras, and a little hope ignited. She made sense. It would be smart to go and find footage and track the bus down, and the girl, and Bucky from the two. His mind was still racing, and it wasn't until Grace suggested the comic book store did he get his wits together and nod. Obediently, he followed her to the building and once they walked in, he instinctively looked around.

He saw many things he recognised, old comics from a long time ago, iconic characters, and some newer things, but while it was certainly interesting they were here for another reason, and so he pulled his gaze away from the shiny covers and instead onto the person behind the counter. It seemed the young teenager behind the counter recognised Steve, for once they approached, his mouth opened and he openly stared at the man known as Captain America.

"Hey," Steve said after an awkward moment of looking at this baffled teen. "Mind if we grab a look at the camera footage of the one outside? We're trying to find a long lost friend." He stated simple and direct, and to the point, and perhaps if the casher was anyone else but an awestruck fanboy, they would have gotten another response, but the boy just nodded, opened the camera footage and passed it all over to the two.

Steve took the mouse and rewound the play through, slowing it down once he saw Bucky appear in the frame. Bucky did not seem to see the camera, but the girl looked directly at it at one point, her face clearly evident. She quickly looked away, and once the bus pulled on, she went in and Bucky followed. Steve replied the footage and watched his friend closely. Bucky was not tense. He seemed rather relaxed. He followed her without any obvious cues and orders, almost as if willingly. Steve replayed the footage again and stopped it on the girl. Now what? He turned to Grace. "So we just look at every bus stop's camera? It would take a while but there's only 17 or so stops. We can do this." He noticed her expression and asked, "Is everything okay?"