With You, I'm Alive

Magnus listened to Alec intently. A big part of him wished that Alec didn't need to apologize, that he'd been able to assure Alec that they would be just fine, that neither of them would lose each other. "I understand why you did it," he told him after a moment before he turned his attention fully to Alec and frowned slightly. "I know your concerns were well placed. I just wish I had been able to calm whatever worries you might have had about our relationship."

---

Lyla was about to reply to his first statement, but the way he had eventually trailed off caused her to look up with concern. Quickly, she shifted to cup his face so that she could make him look at her. "Nothing is going to happen to me, Jace," she said quietly as she stared at him, her eyes locked on his as she hoped to get her point across. "And is going to happen to Alec or Izzy or even Clary, either. And nothing is going to happen to you. We're all going to be okay."

"That is on me again. I should've come to you with my concerns and all my doubts and questions. I shouldn't have gone to anyone else but you. And I definitely shouldn't have been looking into ways to...." With a shake of his head, Alec let out a sigh. "I just, I'm going to grow older and you're going to stay like this forever. I'm going to die, probably sooner rather than later. And I don't know how to deal with any of that."

---

"You don't know that, Ly." With a sigh, he looked down at her. "We're Shadowhunters. We're constantly putting our lives in danger. Every mission we leave on, we don't really know if we're all going to come back. You know that. And the idea of losing you, or Alec or Izzy.... I can't deal with even thinking about it."

Magnus shook his head in response to Alec's words. "Not everything is on you, Alexander," he reminded quietly. He knew that Alec had always been a responsible person and he was stricter on himself than he should be. Personally, Magnus was sure that was why Alec tended to blame himself for most things.

"I should have paid more attention. If I had, perhaps I might have noticed your concerns and insecurities and I could have assured you that everything would be okay." His eyes ran over Alec's features and he genuinely wished that he could ease or soothe Alec's concerns, but he wasn't quite sure how he could do that. "Regardless of my immortality and your mortality, we cannot merely give up. We deserve to be happy. You deserve to be happy."

---

Lyla stared up at him for a moment. She understood his concern; they all shared the same worries. Lyla knew, though, that she didn't have to worry about her friends as much. Jace and Alec would always have each other's backs and they'd never let anything hurt Izzy, so long as they could prevent it.

Shifting, she reached out to touch his cheek, and it might not have been her best idea, but she wanted to comfort him somehow. "You won't lose any of us," she told him quietly, "I know it's a very real possibility, but thinking about it will just distract you and we all have to stay focused if we want to survive, including you. You're not the only one afraid of losing people, Jace. We're afraid of losing you, too."