Magical Bonds

@ BearGirl

Esther wiped the tears from her eyes as Blaise pulled her back into his arms, too tired to really put up much of a fight even if she wanted to. She was heartbroken and exhausted, and as much as she wanted to go inside and sleep with him, her fear of leaving the grave unattended kept her from it. "Of course she's here.. this is where I buried her." Esther murmured, although she was already beginning to drift off to sleep as he held her against his chest. "I can't.. I can't leave her, Blaise.. I just can't.."

Despite her best efforts to stay awake, she was sound asleep not much later, curled into his arms as she clung to his shirt. She'd missed him, the comfort he brought her, and while he couldn't fix everything that was hurting her, he could help bandage the wounds.

@ katahdin

Although he wished to say something against her words, Blaise did not. He knew in his heart that his daughter was not there. If she was old enough to be given a soul by the divine goddess, then they would have taken it by now and cared for her. Though he kept his mouth closed, not wanting to rattle Esther more than she already was.

The moment Esther was asleep in his arms was the moment that Blaise stood up and started to carry her inside. Though once he was in, he didn't know where to go. This was his first time inside of her home...He never thought he would be inside this fire family's house. But there he was, carrying their daughter that he loved dearly. But he was not ready to wander and to open up rooms they might not want him in. So, Blaise went to where he last saw Esther's mother. "Hello?" He called out quietly, trying not to wake up Esther.

@ BearGirl

Miriam appeared shortly after Blaise came inside with Esther, holding a finger to her lips to signal him to be quiet so that he wouldn't wake her daughter before gesturing for him to follow her. She lead him through the halls and upstairs to Esther's room, opening the door for him so he wouldn't have to risk waking Esther.

"This is her room. You are welcome to stay here with her as long as you'd like, or as long as Esther allows you here. You've seen the kitchen, you're welcome to use it too if you need anything." She explained, moving toward the door before pausing. "Do.. Do you think she'll be alright? She's barely slept, doesn't eat what I make for her.. Do you think she'll get better?"

@ katahdin

Trying to be as quiet as possible, Blaise followed Miriam through the house to Esther's room. Though once the door was open, Blaise stopped walking forward and turned to Miriam now that she was speaking to him. He glanced down at Esther for a long moment, taking in everything that the mother was saying.

"Thank you," Blaise whispered, glad that the mother was willing to let him stay in the house for as long as Esther wanted him. And it was also nice to know that he could use the kitchen. It seemed that he would need to make Esther something to eat based on what Miriam was saying. "It will take some time but she will make it through this," Blaise responded. He would make sure that Esther was healthy and happy again.

@ BearGirl

Miriam gave a little nod as Blaise said that Esther would make it through this, feeling better hearing him say it. "I don't know how to help her.. I hope you're right, and that you'll get her through this. If you need anything, don't be afraid to ask. I.. I want to be a better mother to her." She sighed, reaching out to gently brush her fingers over her daughter's hair before leaving the room, wanting to give them privacy.

Shortly after her mother left Esther began to wake, whining tiredly as her eyes fluttered open, curling further into Blaise's arms.

@ katahdin

Blaise had made it to the bed with Ester and was curled up around her. He was resting his head against the pillow, thinking about falling asleep himself when Esther started to wake. His eyes opened and shifted down to look at her. Feeling her curl closer to him, Blaise held her tight, hugging her to his body. Though his hands started to slide down so they were resting against the small of his back.

It was a few moments before Blaise started to speak, wanting to give Esther some time to start to wake up and be aware of her surroundings before he did so. "You didn't sleep very long," Blaise noted gently. His thumb brushed against her back before continuing on. "There are a couple of things I want you to do for me and then we are going to head back to bed. Okay?" Blaise whispered. "Can you do a few things for me?"

@ BearGirl

Esther rubbed at her eyes tiredly as Blaise pulled her closer, blinking sleepily as she looked up at him. A little frown appeared on her lips when he asked her to do something for him before they went back to sleep, her mind immediately going to the unguarded grave outside, worry taking over her features. She couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything else until she knew that she was safe. How could she relax if her child was unprotected?

She forced herself to calm down, though, fingers trembling a little as she gripped the blankets, eventually nodding a bit in answer to Blaise's questions. She could always just sneak out later, after Blaise was asleep. "I can try.. I'll do my best."

@ katahdin

Noticing that she was beginning to tremble, Blaise slid his hands down and took hers into his. He brought her fingers up to him and Blaise gently kissed them. It was important to him that Esther calmed down, though he had no idea if that was really possible for her to do at the moment. Esther was a nervous wreck, there was no doubt about that. "First, I need you to take a shower," Blaise said gently. "And why you are in the shower, I am going to make us both something to eat."

Blaise was quiet for a moment, wanting that to soak in before he continued on. "You can do that for me, right? It is important that you shower and eat. I am here to take care of you but you need to listen, okay?"

@ BearGirl

Esther relaxed a bit as she felt his lips against her fingers, her fingers curling around his as she gave a gentle squeeze. She pouted a bit as he asked her to shower while he made them both something to eat, curling further into his arms. "Can.. Can I take a bath instead? And will you stay with me?" She asked soflty, hoping maybe he'd agree.

When it didn't seem like he would agree she frowned, drawing away from him after a moment. "Ok.. Ok.." she murmured, forcing herself up and out of bed, shuffling over to the bathroom attached to her room to turn on the water, fidgeting with her shirt as she waited for it to heat up.

@ katahdin

When Esther asked if he could stay with her, Blaise shook his head. It was important that he went and made them both something to eat. In truth, Blaise was getting very hungry and from what he heard, it sounded like Esther had gone too long not eating. But he did tell her that she could take a bath if she wanted.

Once Esther made her way to the bathroom, Blaise slid out of the bed and headed downstairs to the kitchen. After going through the fridge and the cupboards, Blaise landed on making them both a grilled cheese sandwich, cut up fruit, and fried peppers. He even grabbed a chocolate bar on the off chance that she would be willing to eat something sweet. Blaise made his way back to the bedroom with two full plates of food.

@ BearGirl

By the time Blaise had returned, Esther had managed to undress and get into the shower, although she hadn't managed to bring herself to start washing herself, having sat down on the floor to let the water run over her while she tried not to panic. She'd started to cry again, but she was doing her best to keep her sniffles and little sobs quiet, so Blaise wouldn't hear her over the sound of the running water.

When she thought she heard Blaise coming closer she quickly grabbed the bottle of shampoo, squirting some into her hand to lather hair quickly. The last thing she wanted was to upset him, make him angry like she had a week ago. For all she knew he didn't want her anymore and was only being kind to her because he pitied her. The water was ice cold by the time she finally turned it off, her skin covered in goosebumps as she remained seated, too cold and tired to get up to grab the towel.

@ katahdin

"Esther, I have dinner!" Blaise called out to the bathroom. He set the plates down on the desk in there and was about to get himself settled. Though when he didn't hear any movement from the bathroom, Blaise made his way over. "Esther?" Blaise called out as he knocked on the door. But he did not wait long before opening it up and looking over to his love, seeing that she was curled up in the shower. The sight was rather unsettling but Blaise made his way over to her and wrapped her up in a towel.

Part of him wanted to ask Esther what was wrong, why she was sitting in the shower like this. Though Blaise was sure he already knew the answer and didn't want to upset her more. So, instead, he just took care of Esther, wiping her down and then helping her into a pair of pajamas. Once she was ready, Blaise brought her back out into the bedroom and had her sit down before handing her the plate of food that he had made for her.

@ BearGirl

Esther looked up at Blaise when he came in, looking away from him as he scooped her up and dried her off. She'd seen the look in his eyes, how worried and disappointed he was with her, and once dressed in her pajamas and seated at the little table by her window, she stared at the food for a long while before looking up at him.

"I-It's ok if you don't want me anymore, Blaise.." She murmured softly, looking down at the plate as she grabbed the fork, pushing the food around the plate aimlessly. "I'm not.. I'm not good anymore, and you deserve someone who's good, and whole, and not broken.." She sunk lower in her seat, struggling to keep her tears at bay. "N-No one would blame you if you left.. I wouldn't blame you, if you left.. All I've ever been good at is disappointing you, a-and I don't want to do that anymore.."

@ katahdin

"Why would you think that?" Blaise whispered to her. He was quick to move from his chair and kneel beside Esther. As he looked up at her, Blaise took her hands into his. He wanted to make sure that he had Esther's full attention. And he needed to ensure that Blaise knew how serious he was about the next words that were to come out of his mouth. He never wanted Esther to question again whether or not he wanted her.

"You are the only woman I want," Blaise told her, his voice was gentle but he could feel the determination in his chest rising up."I love you. I love you with my whole soul and there is no doubt to me that you are the person I want to be with forever. And, yes, things have happened. Between us and..." He let out a small sigh, knowing he needed to refocus. "We are going to get through this together, I promise you. And you aren't broken. This is not going to be easy but we will figure it out. You are someone good and whole. You are the person that I want, Esther."

He paused for a moment, nervousness beginning to rise up in himself before he continued on. "Do you want me? I will understand if you don't so please be honest. I want to be with you but do you still want to be with me?"

@ BearGirl

Esther stared down at her lap even as he moved to her side to kneel down next to her, although her fingers curled around his when he took her hands, squeezing them weakly as she tried to keep herself from crying. His words only made her tears worse though, although the weight from her guilt eased a bit as her heart filled with warmth as he said he loved her.

She gave a little nod as he asked if she wanted him, finally lifting her gaze to look at him. She kept nodding as she pulled her hand away to uselessly wipe at her tears, sniffling as she slid off the chair and moved into his arms. She buried her face in his chest, clinging to his shirt as she cried softly. "I-I want you forever too, Blaise." She finally managed after she got some of her tears under control, curling further into the safety and comfort of his arms.

@ katahdin

A little sigh of relief left Blaise as she moved into his arms. He was quick to hold her close to him but was careful not to hold onto her too tightly. Though his current instinct was to bear hold her to him, he kept his hold firm but comforting. Leaning down, Blaise pressed a kiss against her forehead and then another one against her cheek. "We are going to make it through this, I promise you that. We will figure out everything else after that, just know that we will be together no matter what."

Although part of him was hesitant to even loosen his grip in the slightest, Blaise reached up and slowly ran his fingers through her hair. He wanted to calm her down as much as possible. Blaise meant every word he said, but he couldn't help but wonder what it would take to make Esther feel back to normal. It would be worth it but Blaise wish he knew. "I love you, Esther."

@ BearGirl

It took a few weeks, but eventually Esther felt sure enough that the grave would be undisturbed to leave her mother's house and go back to Blaise's. It took her another week or so before Blaise managed to get her into a routine, going for a short walk after breakfast, spending a few hours in the greenhouse tending to some of the plants, setting up a vegetable garden in the backyard so that she could use her magic for something easy, having a quiet lunch in their room before taking a little nap, making some progress on her lessons in the afternoon before dinner, and then usually going to bed early, before repeating it all the next day. This went on for three months, with Esther becoming more of her normal self each day, but it was clear that losing the baby still bothered her, and that it would still be a while before she was her same cheery self again.

She was sitting in the greenhouse with Blaise as they worked on repotting some of the plants that they had both grown over the past few weeks, Esther carefully filling the pots with dirt while Blaise held the plants in place. They usually made some quiet small talk about what else they'd be doing later that day, but Esther had been quieter than usual, her brows knit together slightly as she worked, lost in thought. "..The greenhouse is getting awfully full, and there isn't anymore space in our room for these plants... Maybe.. maybe we'll need to look for somewhere with more space." She murmured after a while, glancing up at Blaise. They'd both reassured each other in the first weeks after she lost the baby that they each wanted to spend forever with each other, but other than those comforting words they hadn't really done anything to show that. Esther had hoped that they'd find their own apartment or something where they could be alone, feeling a bit overwhelmed living with Blaise's family. But Blaise hadn't made any indications that he was thinking of doing it, or that he was thinking of proposing or anything that Esther thought forever meant, and she'd finally worked up the courage to ask about it, even in a roundabout way.

@ katahdin

As his fingers were deep in the soil, his ears peaked at Esther's gentle soft murmurings. He looked over at her for a moment, a gentle smile on his lips as his eyes roamed over her face. Though eventually, his glazed turned to look at the greenhouse and he let out a small hum in agreement. In truth, he had realized that the two of them were outgrowing more than just the greenhouse a month or so ago. And although he didn't discuss it with her, Blaise felt that they both knew it was time to move on from his parent's home. He was certain that they were meant to be, and although Blaise wasn't one for keeping secrets, he did feel it best to proceed with finding them a new home without her while she was still healing. And to hear her even possibly insinuate about moving on to their future meant that Esther might be ready once he did put his plans in motion.

"I think you are right...but they will be better off here for a little while longer while they grow. We will move them when they are healthy and strong." Blaise responded back gently. Although he was never the best with emotions, Blaise was hoping that he had picked up correctly that she was talking about more than the plants. And he hoped she understood what he was trying to say. Since they were back together, Blaise was trying his best to key into her words and emotions more as well as try to express himself more as well. He wasn't a natural at either but Blaise felt like he was getting better at it.

Sliding his hands out of the pot, Blaise headed over to Esther and pressed a gentle kiss against her forehead. "They just need a little more time. Then we can figure out where to put them." He told her before lightly brushing a thumb against her cheek, smearing some of the dirt on her teasingly.

@ BearGirl

Esther was hopeful that his smile meant that he understood what she was trying to ask, and that he agreed that they ought to move out and find their own spot. But then he was saying that they ought to stay here, that they could always move them later. She tried very hard not to look upset, but it was obvious that she deflated a bit, turning her attention back to the plant that she was potting as she nodded a little.

"Oh.. I understand." Maybe forever to Blaise meant a forever like this; living in his parent's house, helping to take care of their greenhouse. Not that she minded that, she'd just always thought of something more than this kind of life when she pictured their forever. But she was starting to realize that she probably ought to give up on that forever, since it probably wasn't going to happen.

She looked up at Blaise through her lashes when he came over and kissed her forehead, offering him the best smile she could muster as she gave a little nod. "It's ok.. Maybe we could sell them at the farmer's market, or give them to the neighbors..." She leaned her head into his hand, letting out a tired sigh as she closed her eyes. "..I might go take my nap early today, Blaise.. I'm not feeling too great."

@ katahdin

Blaise's smiled faltered for a moment as Esther mentioned taking her nap early. She was upset, he could tell that easily. And worse Blaise was confident that it was because of what he said. But it was able to muster himself back up and his smile grew back to normal. He held her face in his hand, his thumb lightly brushing against her cheek. And, although, it dirtied her face, he hoped it also calmed her down. "I don't think there is a need for that," Blaise told her gently. "We should keep them but we'll move them when the time is right."

Although Blaise was worried that Esther wasn't understanding that he meant 'One day but not yet' for the move. Though he didn't feel safe saying more than that at this point. He had some surprises set up for her and Blaise didn't want to ruin what he had been working on quite hard. And even though she was saddened right now, Blaise knew she would love what he had planned and that it would be worth it. He just needed a little more time. These things took time and Blaise wasn't going to just move them anywhere. It needed to fit them and Esther deserved the perfect home.

His hand slowly slid off of her cheek and he leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss against her lips. "If you want to, love," Blaise told her. Although he was keeping her on a strict schedule, Blaise didn't want to push her too far. If she needed some time, then she would get it. "I have to leave the house for a little while but I'll try to be back before you wake."