300 Confessions Way

  • the god of thunder.

    the god of thunder. (300)

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    I love listening to I Found by Amber Run, it's always this huge wave of clarity pouring over me.
    It makes me think of Eddie and Chris. Stumbling blindly through trauma in a terrible fucking place that maximizes on all of it, and suddenly finding unexpected beacons of clarity and sense in each other.
    February 6th, 2019 at 03:38am
  • kwon jiyong.

    kwon jiyong. (100)

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    i feel like it's been years since a new confessions thread.

    ---

    i'm so tired today. tired this week? tired all the time.
    i miss the quiet and the warmth of long ago days.
    i just want to sleep for a long, long time.

    ---

    i'm drowning in money problems and i don't know how to stop it.
    February 6th, 2019 at 10:27pm
  • the god of mischief.

    the god of mischief. (250)

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    Okay but for real, Chandler > Joey. Coffee
    February 7th, 2019 at 07:44am
  • Unown

    Unown (185)

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    ughhh just seen an ad about housesitting a mansion in the English countryside for 3 wks and getting to look after their dog. Cleaning, house to self and dog company, and getting paid for it? SIGN ME UP it costs money to sign up to the website sobsob even if they weren't expecting me to clean it I would bc I like a challenge, but I'd probs have to use special sprays on certain woods cos the house and family seem THAT posh
    February 7th, 2019 at 04:20pm
  • danny sexbang.

    danny sexbang. (100)

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    I have a lot of fake arguments with my boyfriend in my head. Daydreams of me finally breaking and getting pissed off that he doesn't care enough to take care of certain things. But I'm too much of a coward to actually say anything--I can't take confrontation, even if I'm the one doing it.

    Maybe I'm wanting this to work too much. But I don't think I'm asking too much to keep track of your fucking health insurance so that you don't get penalized on your taxes (because I know you're going to get pissed when you find out, because all you can think of is buying yourself a new computer with your tax refund). I don't think I'm asking too much to get a fucking paystub from work for once so that I can re-apply for you because? All you do when you get home is play video games. While I do everything to keep us and the house afloat. You say that I should ask you when I need help but? But??? Is there an iota in your brain that thinks, "Man, she does a lot for us, maybe I should do something so she doesn't have to worry about it"? Why doesn't it occur to you to do something without me needing to ask?

    Because humans are fucking selfish and that standard applies to everyone, even loved ones.
    February 7th, 2019 at 06:44pm
  • She Said Poptarts

    She Said Poptarts (150)

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    Woke up to a phone call today from my mom to tell me that my brother might have to put down his dog, I've been a crying mess since... and it also doesn't help that I have an exam in 3 hours!! Cry

    Oh God, my heart
    February 7th, 2019 at 08:34pm
  • the god of mischief.

    the god of mischief. (250)

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    The issue is that I can only hear Wade in my head as Ryan Reynolds. Facepalm
    Okay but after listening to The Black Parade for the first time in forever and I relate to it now more than I ever did as a young emo kid.
    February 8th, 2019 at 01:39am
  • lozzieee who.

    lozzieee who. (610)

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    I sadly feel a huge divide in what I know of the Drag community. So many people have fallen in love with Drag but, like me have only really seen it through the lens of Drag Race. There are too many fans out there who spread hatred, so much so they've developed the name 'Stan's' for them. And because a lot of these aggressive Stan's are young hetero white women, there's been a backlash against gender, sexuality and race. Homophobia and heterophobia alike are aflame, racism is as rampant as ever if not more so, and there's even calls to ban women from doing Drag because our presence and our reactions have helped compound a lot of the issues that were already haunting the Drag community and the wider LGBTQ+ community.

    I'm overjoyed to learn more about our history, as a queer person myself. As much as Stonewall and Pulse break my heart and make me wish for a better world, they're teachable moments for people of all flavours and varieties. We're all in this together, celebrating freedom and self love and expression. We're all here because we've felt lonely and left out and unloved at some point because of one element of our identity. So we have to stop tearing each other down for our differences and start building each other up for our unity. Who cares what parts you have or who you present as or whether you're a Pageant Girl, a Club Kid or anything in between. Let's open our arms to anyone who wants to learn or who genuinely wants to ally. Meet hatred with love and maybe the world will end up just that little bit brighter.
    February 8th, 2019 at 12:47pm
  • VixL

    VixL (100)

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    I sexted for the first time in my life this week and it wasn't really fun at all. I also didn't feel sexy. How do people take sexy nude selfies? Maybe I should have used a filter. Probably would have made me feel better about myself. But it was with a bunch of horny online guys, so I don't think they really cared how the quality of the pictures came out as long as they got to see something. But in the end I just googled some pictures of women with way better naked pictures than me and used those instead. Does it count as catfishing if you're just using some internet person's pictures of their body? I guess it does. I tried to sex role play, but that wasn't fun either. I swear because I don't know what I'm talking about or what I'm doing...guys sense that. I feel like two of the guys I talked to in the chat room ditched me because I just had no clue how to be sexy or feminine. I tried to talk to girls too but that just didn't last for long. One girl tried to direct me on how to finger myself. That was...well, interesting. But the funniest is when this guy I was talking to in the chat room told me he was only fifteen. I told him to log off and go to bed, because he was way too young to be up there. But it was funny to me because I remember being 15 and thinking I was mature. Now I see 15 year olds as babies. But all of that online sexting/chat community just made really did was make me feel even more insecure. I don't feel feminine or attractive at all. When I went out to the club last night with my friend two guys approached me. One was drunk and the other bought me a drink but then ditched me I think once he saw what I looked like in the light when I ran into him at the bathroom. I mean I look like a 15 year old. I should be telling my own self to log off and go to bed. I just don't know how women do it. How do they carry themselves so sexy and look so sexy? How? I have bad social anxiety and am really weird, so I guess that plays a part in my overall unattractiveness. But I really want to not be alone forever. I'd at least want experience one real romantic relationship before I die. The weird thing is that last night my friend I was out with called her boyfriend to come meet us at the club. She had told me that he was kind of fat/"hamburgery" was the word she used and that she wasn't really attracted to him. I didn't really think much of him, but watching him help my friend when she got drunk and being there for her oddly turned me on. I thought he was a really nice guy. I get attracted to people more so when I see their character. But then I evaluated myself because I'm a freaking hoe if I'm attracted to a guy my friend is talking to. Am I that desperate?? The answer is: Yes. Because even after we got my friend in safely to her house and I was driving the guy back to his house, I found myself feeling weirdly flirty with him. I mean, I can't flirt to save my life. But we're humans and usually guys can catch the vibe and know when you're into them in that way even if you don't have to say anything. I'm sure there's a animal related term for how I was feeling. But anyway, yeah. It's like I'm looking to fall in love with someone. Holding my breath thinkng, "Is this it?" But it never happens because love is a fantasy (In my Summer Finn voice). Even though I know love doesn't exist and it's really just the need to have sex and procreate (aka my biological clock ticking me towards the fantasy of love to get me to want to go out and procreate)...I still can't deny that I want it. Yeah. But I hate myself and would love to jump off a bridge because I'm so desperate to connect with someone on a romantic level that I'd think about being with my friend's guy Facepalm
    February 8th, 2019 at 11:13pm
  • the god of thunder.

    the god of thunder. (300)

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    I'm honestly at that phase in my life where I'm lowkey at another rock bottom but highkey in a good time way.
    February 9th, 2019 at 04:39am
  • Brittt

    Brittt (100)

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    I am so fucking mad that I am literally shaking. There are no words about how I feel about anything right now. I'm just fucking done.
    February 9th, 2019 at 08:47pm
  • VixL

    VixL (100)

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    I really want to spend the money I’m saving to pay off my deductible when they call me to tell me my car is ready on something that’ll make me feel pretty again. Whether that be a new outfit, hairstyle, tube of lipstick, or even just getting my eyebrows waxed. But I also don’t want to spend the money and I instead would rather have my car back and pay my great grandma some money like I said I would. I have these two sides of me rn.
    February 10th, 2019 at 05:59am
  • Nyctophilia.

    Nyctophilia. (100)

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    as much as I love writing and have been doing it since i was 14. I confess I’ve never really felt creative enough to write full on stories. I have limited myself to one shots or short stories mostly. I started writing again after a long hiatus and feeling the itch to make a story. I’m in shock that somehow I’m on chapter 11.

    I’m praying I can keep this up and finally be able to say I finished a story. While I’m certainly not claiming to be Edgar Allen Poe over here, I know my ideas aren’t always the most clever or intriguing.

    But I’m pretty fucking proud of myself right now.
    February 10th, 2019 at 09:09pm
  • raja sahara

    raja sahara (100)

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    For once, I actually wanna be single. So sorry, dude, about the flaking and ghosting lol but you'll get over it. I just wanna write and take my dog to the park Shifty
    Ok I slightly revamped Wonderland which means what I have posted on here won't make sense with what I ended up turning it into. Not that it's a huge change but the very first chapter is slightly different soooooo. And I'm so lazy about reposting it that I'm wondering if I should just scrap it on here Think
    I miss Cancun Sad
    February 11th, 2019 at 04:36pm
  • VixL

    VixL (100)

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    I met this one girl in my psychology class. My social anxiety flairs up whe I try to talk to her, but honestly even though she seems nice I can’t tell if she’s mean or not and if I should stay away from her. She’s the same personality type as my mom. And my mom is known to be fakenice. Why do I get that vibe from her? Or is it just my insecurities of feeling rejection leading me to not want to go out on a limb and try to make a new friend? I don’t know. I also don’t know if I should keep talking to Caroline or not. That nightout really left me scarred because she became a angry drunk. Trying to make friends irl is hard. Sometimes I think it is better just to stay to myself. Leaves no room for getting hurt by people.
    February 11th, 2019 at 08:30pm
  • the god of mischief.

    the god of mischief. (250)

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    I'm stepping it up this week and really doing shit in class. Like not just telling myself that it'll happen but writing it down onto a list and DOING it. I've already turned in 2 late assignments due to senioritis. Facepalm
    ps i'm being destroyed tonight by the idea of ben being torn apart in several different directions by the force and his life experiences ok bye
    February 12th, 2019 at 12:55am
  • lozzieee who.

    lozzieee who. (610)

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    Jesus Christ I am so angry at the world, and even angrier that I'm angry over this bullshit. I am so tired of the general public crying out for hard evidence on a case they have no say in. YOU DON'T GET EVIDENCE, THE LAWYERS DO YOU CRETIN. You, the public, are laypeople who don't know your ratio from your obiter. You don't understand the law, you barely know it. You don't know the precedents and the judgements and how certain things are viewed I the courts - you don't have a say because you don't realise the law isn't black and white. You are not entitled to watch this play out, because you make up your mind based on what you can see and hear, not based on the real facts. So, basically, fuck off and let the people who are actually trained in this shit work it out.
    February 12th, 2019 at 01:25pm
  • Unown

    Unown (185)

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    I just slapped my hand to divert my dog's attention when he started woofing and his reaction was to come trundling over and lick my hand lmfao He's so adorable (but annoying af at the same time). He must be thinking: 'hooman, why you hitting yourself?D:' Oh great, he just farted. Share the love...
    February 12th, 2019 at 07:56pm
  • the god of mischief.

    the god of mischief. (250)

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    I say this about a new male figure literally every week but can I please just be Brendon Urie this week?
    I'm also just a Star Wars mess tonight ugh why do i do this sort of shit to myself??
    Oh yeah, I butted heads with a professor today AND WON.
    February 13th, 2019 at 02:14am
  • VixL

    VixL (100)

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    I really just want to take a shower. I hate that I have to be such a male and female in this house. Literally a bag of trash will be sitting by the door and my fourteen year old brother won’t get his ass up from playing video games fo take it out. He won’t even go outside and ask my great grandfather if he needs help mowing the lawn or fixing the porch. All he does is sit there playing video games. So, I have to be the great granddaughter and the great grandson in this house. I also hate that I can’t take a shower since my mom broke the shower rod in the nasty bathroom I share with her and the rest of my siblings. She looked at me nasty when I asked her if she was going to get a new shower rod? This makes the second day in a row that she’s forgotten to get a shower rod. I was going to take it upon myself to fix the one she broke, but my great grandpa said not to worry about it because she’s supposed to be buying a new one. Why does she make me out to be the bad guy just because I asked if she was getting the shower rod that she was supposed to get two days ago? I know she doesn’t take showers often. The one time she did she ended up falling and breaking the rod. But still. I’m already struggling with feeling masculine enough as it is. I don’t want to feel even more masculine by not showering and having my hair nap up like some boys. My mom can get away with smelling like sour milk because she wears long blonde wigs. But I have short hair and wear a track suit nearly everyday. Being smelly only makes me feel even less feminine. I know I can take a shower in my great grandparent’s room, but I don’t feel comfortable going in there bothering their space since my great grandpa just had surgery. I also don’t like that my mom keeps testing me. It’s like she wants to get on my nerves. She sends me messages and I literally just ignore them. Whenever I see her my stomach churns, too. I remember when I was little I used to love everytjing about my mom: her smell, her prescence, her very existence. Nowadays I could really care less to see her. She just puts me in a bad mood whenever I even hear her voice. And that’s probably why back when she did fall in the shower I didn’t run to go check on her. She could have been seriously hurt...but honestly...no part of me even reacted when I heard the sound of crashing in the bathroom. No part of me. Not even a instinct to go see if she was ok ran through me. The thing is I don’t hate her...but I don’t love her anymore either. I just feel like I no longer care for her or about her. But I know I’m not the only person who feels this way about their parents. It’s more common than people like to admit.
    My car is fixed!!!!!! Crazy Dance Now I just need more money, life purpose, a career, a better social life, and my own place because I’m mentally checking out once again. But thank God my baby is back!! Cry
    The shower rod has been bought! My car is fixed! I took a shower and just feel so clean and rejuventated. I aslo straightened up the room today which lifted my mood, too. Last night I was feeling so low but tonight I feel much better. I also have my headphones back. I can weather these storms Cute
    February 13th, 2019 at 02:53am