Gay Couples Adopting

  • Shay;;

    Shay;; (100)

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    I think Gay couples should be able to adopt. I don't feel as if it really matters. Their still human, Their still capable of doing all the things you or I could do. Sure, It may be tough explanning it the child. Yet, Most kids in that situation, are better adjusted to change, and other things throught there lives. I believe in equal rights across the board and feel that they should be able to adopt.
    October 13th, 2012 at 06:21am
  • LostinTime

    LostinTime (200)

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    I think gay couples should be allowed to adopt for this simple reason: They actually want the children. Straight couples had kids they didn't want (in a lot of circumstances) and these pairs (the homosexual ones) are willing to fight just to be able to raise children. I think they should be applauded for wanting to take on the responsibility together.
    October 13th, 2012 at 08:44am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    @ Shay;;
    I don't even think it would be that difficult to explain. 'Some people love the same gender.' Done. And kids who grow up with it, most likely won't question it.
    October 13th, 2012 at 06:23pm
  • Shay;;

    Shay;; (100)

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    @ dru will wait.
    I think they would. They go to school and everyday get asked why they have two moms, or dads.
    October 13th, 2012 at 07:17pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    @ Shay;;
    Actually, studies show that children of gay parents are not more likely to get bullied than other students and they are very likely to be highly adjusted to such petty bullshit.
    October 13th, 2012 at 08:00pm
  • kafka.

    kafka. (150)

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    @ dru will wait.

    I don't know what statistics you're referring to, but the study GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network) did on children with LGBT family members found that
    Quote
    For many students with LGBT parents, school is not a very safe environment. Half (51%) of all students in our study reported feeling unsafe in school because of a personal characteristic, such as their actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender, or race/ethnicity. The most commonly reported reasons for feeling unsafe were because of their family constellation, i.e., having LGBT parents (23%) and because of their actual or perceived sexual orientation (21%). Although most students in our study did not report being victimized in school, a not insignificant number reported that they had been verbally harassed in school because of their family (40%). In addition to experiencing harassment based on having LGBT parents, some students from LGBT families also experienced difficulties in terms of their peers’ assumptions or perceptions about their own sexual orientation, that is they were presumed to be gay or lesbian simply because they had a parent who was LGBT. Although the vast majority of students in the study identified as heterosexual, 38% reported being verbally harassed in school because of their actual or perceived sexual orientation. [...] A small percentage of students reported being directly mistreated by or receiving negative comments from a teacher because of their family (11% and 15%, respectively). However, many students with LGBT parents may experience more subtle forms of exclusion from their school. More than a quarter (30%) of students in our study reported feeling that they could not fully participate in school specifically because they had an LGBT parent, and 36% felt that school personnel did not acknowledge that they were from an LGBT family (e.g., not permitting one parent to sign a school form because he or she was not the student’s legal parent or guardian). In addition, about a fifth of students reported that they had been discouraged from talking about their parents or family at school by a teacher, principal or other school staff person (22%) and felt excluded from classroom activities because they had an LGBT parent (20%). For example, some students described incidents in which representations of LGBT families were not included in class activities, such as when constructing a family tree. (p. xv - xvi)
    (source)

    I don't know whether coping with constant microaggressions / subtle homophobic violence and exclusion (not to mention more obviously harmful stuff) is best described as becoming 'highly adjusted' to 'petty bullshit'. I mean, my university ranks very high nationally in terms of queer-friendliness, there are clubs, comprehensive anti-discrimination policies, a lot of openly not straight staff etc - but even here people still use gay as an insult and LGBT issues are brushed off as irrelevant in class discussions - and although I'm 20 and I'm pretty used to dealing with homophobia, it's still upsetting at times.

    This is not to say that same-sex couples should be prevented from adopting children - rather that we have to do a lot more to protect people from homophobic violence in schools / educational institutions - and that legitimizing homophobia by not allowing same-sex couples to adopt children has very harmful effects.
    October 13th, 2012 at 09:07pm
  • Ilmr

    Ilmr (100)

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    I think same-sex couples should be completely allowed to adopt. I dont see any problems with having two mums or two dads (except on how you would call them as a kid. Mum and mummy?) Of course there are issues with bullying, etc for the children but to be honest- I think if you are going to be a target of bullying then nothing you can do will really change that. (Bullied throughout schooling personally just for being me).

    As long as a kid has someone that loves them and stuff like that- who cares? (in my opinion)

    Although another subject I didnt really understand on how it could be approached is the whole role models and 'looking up to' thing. Stereotypically I suppose this is the same sex as you but hey.. I never really had anyone I looked up to or aspired to be so.. /offtopic. :l

    Anyway, in the words of the Beatles- All you need is love. ;3
    October 21st, 2012 at 01:18pm
  • Monroe;

    Monroe; (615)

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    "It's lousy on children who are adopted by gay couples. What if when they are older they don't want gay parents?" - Anonymous.

    Thoughts on this?
    October 21st, 2012 at 07:41pm
  • Kurtni

    Kurtni (10125)

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    Draco.:
    "It's lousy on children who are adopted by gay couples. What if when they are older they don't want gay parents?" - Anonymous.

    Thoughts on this?
    No children pick who their parents are, biological or adopted.
    October 22nd, 2012 at 03:18am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    @ Draco.
    Besides what Kurtni said, most children of gay parents won't grow up to be homophobic. After all, homophobia is a social disease, ingrained into us, not something we are born. With the right parental influence, it won't ever be an issue.
    October 23rd, 2012 at 05:13pm
  • Miss.J.isamonster

    Miss.J.isamonster (100)

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    I think they might as well be able to adopt, it shouldn't be such a big deal, at least the child will have a family who loves and cares for them. The fact that people don't want gay couples to adopt just because they're homophobic (Which is complete bull, because they don't really have a fear, the majority are just assholes.) is awful. I believe that if you can provide a stable and loving home you should be allowed to adopt regardless of sexual orientation.
    October 24th, 2012 at 09:34pm
  • Valiente

    Valiente (200)

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    Honestly, I think members of the LGBT community should be allowed to adopt children. If the birth-parents didn't want the poor child(ren), then why deny the couple a child or multiple children just because they happen to be a same-sex couple? The child(ren) should be provided with a healthy and happy home. If a gay couple can provide that, then I don't see a problem. I'm not speaking as a member of the LGBT community. I'm speaking as an average person
    October 30th, 2012 at 12:46am
  • Mother Jellybean

    Mother Jellybean (100)

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    I think gay/lesbian couples should be able to adopt children!
    October 30th, 2012 at 01:16am
  • roses and robots

    roses and robots (100)

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    You should have complete rights to adopt if you're gay. Just because you're sexual orientation is different than the usual, it doesn't affect your ability to be a parent.
    November 24th, 2012 at 11:13pm
  • ponder hop.

    ponder hop. (100)

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    I think gays/lesbian couples should be able to adopt because they actually take the time to go through all these papers and laws to try to get a child and every child is loved because a huge amount of time has been spent in order to get to adopt a child. They go through months and months of paperwork.
    Sometimes it feels like some adoption centers are just like: "heterosexual parents can go in, adopt a kid without worry - it doesn't matter if the parents are abusive. They're heterosexual, so whatever."

    (and this has probably already been mentioned tehe)
    December 10th, 2012 at 12:08pm
  • wxyz

    wxyz (240)

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    ^ From what I know, it's not actually that easy for heterosexual couples to adopt either. There's a whole load of paperwork involved for them too, as well as home visits, etc.
    December 10th, 2012 at 05:45pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    @ banshee smile.
    I doubt every gay couple with children are the absolute saint of parents. Just like heterosexuals, there are bad and good people in the mix.

    I really hate the "gays are holier than thou" mentality. It's like a patronizing version of homophobia, sorta.
    December 11th, 2012 at 01:41am
  • ponder hop.

    ponder hop. (100)

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    @ dahoo dores dru.
    True.

    But then again, let me point out. People fight for gay marriages. Not every gay couple wants to marry. As long as the parents are fine, adoption should be allowed regardless of race, gender, orientation, etc.
    December 11th, 2012 at 01:48am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    @ banshee smile.
    Yes, and the first couple to marry in Massachusetts is now divorced.

    Adoption should be allowed as long as the parent(s) are acceptable, regardless of anything. But let's not shoo gays to the front of the line because they're the adoption Messiahs. They're just like straight couples trying to adopt.
    December 11th, 2012 at 01:49am
  • Daryl Dixon.

    Daryl Dixon. (100)

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    I think gays should be able to adopt, in the sense that couples should be judged upon their suitability rather than their sexuality.
    December 17th, 2012 at 12:30am