@ dru will wait.
I don't know what statistics you're referring to, but the study GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network) did on children with LGBT family members found that
- Quote
- For many students with LGBT parents, school is not a very safe environment. Half (51%) of all students in our study reported feeling unsafe in school because of a personal characteristic, such as their actual or perceived sexual orientation, gender, or race/ethnicity. The most commonly reported reasons for feeling unsafe were because of their family constellation, i.e., having LGBT parents (23%) and because of their actual or perceived sexual orientation (21%). Although most students in our study did not report being victimized in school, a not insignificant number reported that they had been verbally harassed in school because of their family (40%). In addition to experiencing harassment based on having LGBT parents, some students from LGBT families also experienced difficulties in terms of their peers’ assumptions or perceptions about their own sexual orientation, that is they were presumed to be gay or lesbian simply because they had a parent who was LGBT. Although the vast majority of students in the study identified as heterosexual, 38% reported being verbally harassed in school because of their actual or perceived sexual orientation. [...] A small percentage of students reported being directly mistreated by or receiving negative comments from a teacher because of their family (11% and 15%, respectively). However, many students with LGBT parents may experience more subtle forms of exclusion from their school. More than a quarter (30%) of students in our study reported feeling that they could not fully participate in school specifically because they had an LGBT parent, and 36% felt that school personnel did not acknowledge that they were from an LGBT family (e.g., not permitting one parent to sign a school form because he or she was not the student’s legal parent or guardian). In addition, about a fifth of students reported that they had been discouraged from talking about their parents or family at school by a teacher, principal or other school staff person (22%) and felt excluded from classroom activities because they had an LGBT parent (20%). For example, some students described incidents in which representations of LGBT families were not included in class activities, such as when constructing a family tree. (p. xv - xvi)
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I don't know whether coping with constant microaggressions / subtle homophobic violence and exclusion (not to mention more obviously harmful stuff) is best described as becoming 'highly adjusted' to 'petty bullshit'. I mean, my university ranks very high nationally in terms of queer-friendliness, there are clubs, comprehensive anti-discrimination policies, a lot of openly not straight staff etc - but even here people still use gay as an insult and LGBT issues are brushed off as irrelevant in class discussions - and although I'm 20 and I'm pretty used to dealing with homophobia, it's still upsetting at times.
This is not to say that same-sex couples should be prevented from adopting children - rather that we have to do a lot more to protect people from homophobic violence in schools / educational institutions - and that legitimizing homophobia by not allowing same-sex couples to adopt children has very harmful effects.